The light in all the pain
by Briionyy-Ransommm
Summary: Bella and her brother Zach were recently orphaned. The new boys in town know how that feels and one of them wites a song for her. When he performs it to her, she opens up her life to him. But when he enters it, tragedy occurs. R&R!i dont own twilight
1. Hardest Goodbyes all BPOV

**I hope you guys like this story! I know I've been slack with my other ones, and…. This is why! Love you all. This chapter is for Kimmo, most of them will be rofl. She makes me write it all! She said this sounds amazing when I told her about it at school, so take her word for it! I cried while writing it FYI (:  
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"Goodbye Mum, I'll miss you every second of every day, and I will always shed tears for the times with you that have been stolen away from me. I'll always be your little girl Mummy; tripping over and hurting myself, laughing when you got angry with me; but most of all, I'll always have a heart full of love to give, I just really don't know where I'm going to give it" I whimpered. I stood down from the podium and sat in the front row of the church. I felt hollow; everything in my life was crumbling. I always thought that my Mummy would live forever; that she would protect me after Daddy died; but here I am, agonized and orphaned.

The ceremony finished and we headed back to my Aunt May's summer house for the wake. My Mum had died here while we were vacationing last week. We were supposed to stay the whole summer, but only three weeks in and she drowned at the beach. How was I supposed to carry on? I was only 16 and I didn't have any parents.  
"I think you did wonderfully Bells" Aunt May smiled as I stood at her kitchen sink, staring at the beach through the window.  
"I don't know what I'm going to do" I whispered and tears strolled down my face as I remembered finding my mother's blue body lying on the beach.  
"No matter what you do, I'll always be here to help you along the way" she whispered and kissed my head before walking out to join the other guests.  
"Bewwa?" I heard a small voice whisper and I turned to see my little brother Zach peeking through the kitchen door.  
"Hey Zach, how are you" I sniffled, wiping my stray tears away.  
"I'm okay. When's Mummy coming home?" he whispered innocently and my heart broke again. I'd told him that Mummy had gone to heaven, but he still thought she was going to come home. How do you tell a five year old that he'll never see his parents again?  
"Mummy isn't coming home Zachy" I whispered and a tear strolled down his cheek. His bottom lip jutted out and trembled.  
"But I want her to," he whimpered and tears strolled down his cheeks.  
"I know Zach, so do I" I sobbed and dropped to the floor to hug him. He rushed into my arms and sobbed into the crook of my neck.  
"I love you Bewwa" he whimpered and I closed my eyes, which let a few more tears escape. I hugged Zach closer to me and sniffled.  
"I love you too Zach. Promise me something?" I asked and he pulled away to look at me.  
"Ok" he whispered and I smiled a sad smile.  
"Don't ever forget Mummy and Daddy okay?" I whispered and he nodded vigorously.

"Bella, Zach, are you both in here?" Uncle Tom asked from behind the kitchen door.  
"Yes Uncle Tom" I whispered and he entered the room quietly.  
"How are you kids?" he whispered sadly and my lips began to tremble once again.  
"We've had better days Uncle Tom" I sobbed and then broke into a full round of hysterics. Uncle Tom threw his arms around Zach and I; and he rocked us back and forward.  
"It's okay Kids, I'm here. I'll help you through this" he whispered. It was extremely hard to sit in the same room as Uncle Tom sometimes; the reason being that he was our Dad's identical twin brother.  
"Daddy's not coming home either is he?" Zach whispered and I shook my head solemnly. Zach and I had a wonderful life until about three months ago. Our dad was diagnosed into terminal Hodgkin's Lymphoma; which is type of Leukemia and within weeks, he'd died. It was quick and luckily he didn't feel any pain; but he'd left us here and so had Mum, but I couldn't let that get to me.  
"I'll go get your things" Uncle Tom whispered. We had to return to our house this afternoon and I wasn't ready to face it. I hadn't prepared myself to enter our empty home and I knew it would be nothing less than heartbreaking.  
"Thanks Uncle Tom" I whimpered and helped Zach to his feet. Uncle Tom disappeared behind the double doors and returned ten minutes later.  
"The car is all packed" he whispered gravely and I nodded numbly.

The drive back to Phoenix was an uneventful one. I spent most of the time sleeping away my sorrows and when I woke up, I saw the house that now held nothing but sadness for me.  
"Zach wake up" I whispered, nudging him awake. His eyes fluttered open and he stared at the house.  
"Do we have to go in?" he whispered. He turned to me for my answer and I nodded at him.  
"It's our only physical memory of Mummy and Daddy" I whimpered and he nodded helplessly. How could God put a five year old kid in so much pain? How could he put our family through this? I hadn't even recovered from Dad yet and now I don't have my Mum either.  
"Okay, let's go" he mumbled and got out of the car. He ran to the door and opened it.  
"Zach hang on, come and get your things" I called and he called out of the house looking sadder then he had when he went in.  
"What's the matter Zach?" I asked urgently.  
"Mummy's not in the kitchen making brownies" he whimpered and then he burst into tears.  
"I know Zach I know" I whimpered, picking Zach up and cradling his shaking frame in my arms. He threw his arms around my neck and sobbed into my shoulder.  
"Promise you won't leave me Bewwa" he whispered and I sniffled painfully.  
"I promise Zach" I promised and knew that one day, I would break that promise.

Our first week here had to be the hardest. Each night Zach woke up screaming for our parents and all I could do was comfort him while crying. I think Aunt May and Uncle Tom were getting worried about him. They lived with us now, in the guest room. I slept in my parents' bed for the first few nights, because I needed to feel their presence. When I woke up to Mum's cell phone ringing, my heart split in two.  
"Hello?" I whimpered.  
"Renee, thank god I caught you. I'm sorry for the late hour. I was wondering, what did Sam do with the Lambridge case files?" A chatty, executive voice babbled.  
"I'm sorry this isn't Renee, this is Bella; her daughter" I whimpered and the voice abruptly stopped.  
"Oh, can you please put Renee on?" the voice asked and I let out a cry of pain.  
"No, I'm sorry. My Mum died last week" I whispered once I'd composed myself, but the words cut like a serrated knife.  
"Oh, well, never mind then" the voice said sadly and hung up. I cried myself back to sleep that night and when I woke up, I put on some of my mother's clothes; they still smelled like her. After that I put on her perfume and some earrings Dad had gotten her.  
"Bewwa, what are you doing?" I heard Zach whisper from the doorway. My head whipped over to him and I broke down on the floor in a crumpled, broken heap.  
"Aunty May!" Zach screeched as he rushed out of the bedroom. Aunt May rushed in about two minutes later and saw me shaking with hysteria on the floor.  
"Oh Bella" she whispered sadly and came to hug me.  
"Aunt May, I-I-I w-w-want them b-b-back" I sobbed into her chest and she stroked my hair back.  
"I know sweety, Shh" she whispered soothingly and soon I fell asleep with my head on her lap.

"I know you can do this" Aunt May said confidently. It was my first day back at school since Mum had died and I wasn't sure if I could go through with it.  
"I don't know if I can" I whispered and looked at my feet. Aunt May put one hand on each of my shoulders and forced me to look her in the eye.  
"You listen to me Isabella Marie Swan, you can do this. Your mother would be so proud at how strong you've been so far" she whispered and her voice cracked at the end.  
"I haven't been that strong. I dressed up in her clothes, put on her perfume and jewelry; I don't think that resembled bravery" I mumbled and a tear slid down my cheek.  
"No, that represents mourning" she sighed.  
"I miss them" I whispered and she nodded.  
"I do too Honey. Now come on or you'll be late" she said and the bus doors opened. Wow, creepy timing. I hugged her goodbye and then stepped onto the bus. I sat right up the back and plugged my earphones into my ears.  
"… and she closed her eyes, found relief in a knife…" I sang sadly and when I looked up I noticed all eyes were on me.  
"You want to take a picture?" I snapped and stomped off the bus once it'd stopped.  
"Bella" I heard a familiar voice sigh. I turned to see Alice and Rosalie, my best friends walking towards me. My eyes instantly pricked and I broke down into tears.  
"I'm s-s-sorry" I whimpered as Alice embraced me.  
"Nonsense Bella" she said sternly and pulled back so Rosalie could hug me.  
"I know what you're going through, so if you need anything, I'm there" Rose whispered. It was true; both her parents had died at the same time in a car accident three years ago. Her eyes were grave and her face was full of sadness when she pulled back to look at me.  
"Hey, thanks. How have you guys been?' I whispered, trying to divert all the attention from myself.  
"Rose and I have new boyfriends!" Alice cheered and I smiled at her enthusiasm. My cheeks hurt; I hadn't smiled in a while.  
"Really?" I whispered incredulously.  
Alice and Rose both nodded and then two boys walked over to where we were standing.  
"Speak of the devils" Alice began and I giggled silently.  
"And the devils shall appear" Rose finished and I snickered a little louder.  
"Hey Rosie" the big boy said. He was _huge_, like, he reminded me of the incredible hulk; only he wasn't green. But somehow, reminded me of a giant teddy bear.  
"Emmett, this is Bella" Rosalie smiled at him and his eyes were full of knowledge.  
"Ah, Bella Swan. Nice to finally meet you" he chuckled and took me into a bone crushing hug.  
"Can't… breath!" I said breathlessly. When I looked at Rose, she had one arm across her stomach and the other covering her face. It was highly amusing. I laughed and then it cut off into a sob.  
"Emmett, we need to talk to Bella. I'll see you later okay?" Rose whispered and kissed his cheek. She took me by the arm and I heard Alice say goodbye to the blonde boy. I caught that his name was Jasper.  
"What happened back there babe?" Rose whispered caringly and I sniffled.  
"It feels wrong to laugh" I whimpered. She and Alice both took me into a large bear hug and soon we were all heading to our classes.

As I sat in biology, I felt dizzy. I swayed in my seat and then fainted onto the floor. Good thing that the desk next to me had always been empty.  
"Isabella, can you open your eyes for me?" I heard the nurse whisper. I tried to obey, and soon my eyes fluttered open.  
"W-w-what happened?" I whispered and I saw Rose breathe a sigh of relief.  
"You fainted in biology sweetheart" the nurse said tenderly. I nodded and tried to get up from the bed, but when I did, my head spun again.  
"Careful Isabella. You've been under a lot of stress lately, that's why you fainted" the nurse cautioned and I saw that Alice had been crying.  
"What's wrong Alice?" I whispered and she sobbed brokenly.  
"You were so pale, I thought I'd lost you" she whimpered and I waved her over.  
"I won't leave as long as I can prevent that. Do you hear me Alice?" I said urgently and she nodded. When I looked around at the greater picture, I saw that Emmett and Jasper were in the room also.  
Do you think Edward might…?" Jasper trailed off when he saw that I was looking at him.  
"Definitely" Emmett smiled.  
"Who's Edward?" I asked curiously and they stiffened.  
"He's our other brother. He's touring with his band at the moment, so he won't be at school for a few weeks. I nodded, confused. Why did they bring him up if he wasn't even here?  
"Why did you talk about him just then?" I whispered and Jasper nudged Emmett with his elbow.  
"I… uh… I mean we… um, hey did you know that Edward's performing at a concert here next week?" Emmett stammered and I chuckled.  
"Yeah, I'm sure that's what you said" I laughed and had that same guilty feeling again. I clutched my stomach and my laughter turned to sorrow once again.  
"You should all come" Jasper whispered and he came over to me.  
"I lost my parents last year, both of them, I know what you're going through, but believe me, a night out is fun" Jasper whispered into my ear and I nodded weakly.  
"Sounds good" I mumbled incoherently.

"Well, well, well, if it isn't little miss Bella Swan?" I heard a familiar voice chuckled and I turned to see my best friend guy friend walking in my direction.  
"Jacob, hey" I breathed as he pulled me into his embrace. Tears had already been sliding down my cheeks, but I wanted them to stop, so I shut my eyes and took a deep, unsteady breath.  
"I've missed you like crazy" he whispered into my hair and I snuffled my face closer to his chest.  
"Believe me, I have missed you too" I whimpered with a broken voice.  
"My dad sends his regards by the way" he sighed and let go of me.  
"No, please, hold me just for a little longer" I objected weakly. He nodded and held me tighter, engulfing me with his friendship.  
"It's time for class now, do you want me to walk you?" he whispered and I nodded.  
"Yes please Jake" I mumbled and he let go of me, but not completely. He wrapped his arm around my waste and walked with my curled into his side. When we stopped at my classroom, he kissed my forehead.  
"I really did miss you honey" he mumbled and walked away.

The rest of the day past in a blur, I just wanted to get home and curl up in my parents bed, but Alice had other plans.  
"You're staying at my house tonight!" she squealed and I reluctantly obliged.  
"Welcome back here Bella" Alice's mum Mary smiled as soon as the three of us walked through the door.  
"Thanks Mrs. Brandon" I smiled.  
"You're welcome. Rosalie, Alice, I'm shocked. No Jasper and Emmett today?" Mrs. Brandon chuckled and Alice and Rose looked down at their feet.  
"They don't come every day Mum" Alice wined and her Mum chuckled.  
"Oh, no, 24/7 is hardly enough time" she joked, rolling her eyes and then she walked back into the kitchen.  
"Bella, did you want some brownies?" she called form the kitchen and my heart broke in two.

_My _Mummy used to make me brownies…


	2. Singing with the pain all EPOV

**This chapter is for Kimmo as well, thanks for believing in me beautiful girl!  
Yes, I cried while writing most of this chapter too…********  
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I picked up my phone and sighed. Jasper was calling for the tenth time today.  
I huffed and frustration but answered the phone.  
"What do you want Jasper?" I mumbled angrily into the phone.  
"About time you answered the phone!" he hissed at me and I chuckled.  
"I had a really big gig last night Jazz, can we talk later?" I groaned and he laughed.  
"No, I really need to talk to you about something…NOW" he pushed and I moaned in surrender.  
I got out of my comfy hotel bed and walked out onto the patio to look over New York.  
"Ok Jazz, what's on your mind?" I sighed and I heard him take a deep breath.  
"Well, you know how Emmett and I have girlfriends?" he asked and I snorted.  
"Yeah" I laughed and I heard him sigh.  
"Well, their best friend is having a really hard time right now. Edward, her parents just died" Jasper whispered and my heart instantly sank. I didn't know the girl, but I had great sympathy for anyone who was fighting that same battle that I've fought before.  
"Really? That's horrible" I whispered and Jasper seemed to agree.  
"I want you to write a song about her. She's coming to the gig next week" he said and I blinked in astonishment.  
"Jasper, I don't even know the girl" I hissed into the line.  
"I know Edward, but once you see this girl eyes, you won't be able to look away. They hold so much sadness" he said and he seemed to whimper slightly.  
"Ok, fine. I'm coming to town tomorrow anyway; you and Emmett come meet me. I don't want anyone else there. I'm not ready to be introduced back into reality yet" I sighed and Jasper agreed.  
"Ok, bye Jazz"  
"Bye Eddie" he chuckled and hissed. I then returned to my bed and collapsed with my phone in my hand.

When I got to Phoenix and went to the main shopping centre.  
"Eddie!" I heard and I shuddered. I turned to see my idiotic brothers waving at me.  
"Hey guys, Emmy, Jazz-min" I laughed and they both grimaced.  
"You're not very nice" Emmett huffed and folded his arm across his chest. I chuckled loudly but composed myself when I saw Emmett was glaring at me.  
"1000 apologies Emmett and Jasper" I said and they both smiled. I rolled my eyes and we went walking.  
"So, how the hell can I write a song about a girl I've never met before?" I mumbled and Jasper punched my shoulder.  
"You just have to imagine what she's going through. We can all do that all too easily" he whispered the last part. It was hard on us, thinking about our parents. We missed them like crazy and I can never forgive myself for being responsible for their death.  
"I'm sorry they're gone" I whispered and Emmett slapped me across the face.  
"It's not your fault! Stop blaming yourself! They would have driven you to your gig that day anyway!" he yelled and I looked away, my face still stinging.  
"God Emmett, you hit like a girl. And plus, I shouldn't even be alive" I whispered and now jasper slapped the other side of my face.  
"Edward Cullen, it is _not_ your fault okay? Mum and Dad would have died some time anyway. It just happened a little sooner than expected. And besides, what would Emmett and I have done without you?" he whispered and I nodded.  
"Now, don't bring us down today Bro, we're here to help you with inspiration on that song you're going to write for Bella" Emmett smiled cheerily and I chuckled at his child like behavior.

We were sitting in the food court and I was biting into my Red Rooster burger. I looked up and I saw the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen. They were brown to the core but so full of agony. My heart broke just seeing the pain in them and I wished I could take that pain away. I didn't know her and she didn't know me, but suddenly her cheeks flooded with blood and she blushed a beautiful red. She smiled and looked away but her smile was pained. Then, I thought of the impossible chances.  
"Jazz" I said as I nudged him, he looked at me with his mouth stuffed with KFC.  
"Yeah?" he said with a mouth full of food.  
"Would that girl over there be Isabella by any chance?" I asked and he followed when I nodded.  
His eyes widened and he quickly swallowed his wicked wing.  
"Yes, oh great, now you can write a really good song about her" he said enthusiastically and I already had words in my mind.  
_I can see it in your eyes, so scared…._NOW IS NOT THE TIME EDWARD!

Jasper, Emmett and I spent the rest of the day looking at music gear. I fell in love with a les Paul acoustic guitar.  
"Just buy it Edward" Jasper said, "stop giving it goo, goo eyes" he chuckled and I smacked him in the back of the head.  
"I will then" I said and being the sophisticated, mature musician that I am; i stuck my tongue out at him. I took the guitar to the cashier and payed for it with half the money from my last gig.  
"So, got any ideas for a song for Bella yet?" Jasper asked, feigning nonchalance.  
"As a matter of fact, yes I do" I said and turned away from him. We were walking back to the parking lot and saw three girls, one of them was Bella.  
"Emmett? Ahh Emmett!" the blonde one screamed and she ran over to him. He picked her up and swung her around. The other girl, the pixie like one, walked over to Jasper and kissed him sweetly. I shuddered and kept walking.  
"Eddie, come back and meet our girls" Emmett whined and I sighed. I rolled my eyes and turned back around.  
"Eddie? You're Edward?" the pixie one said and I nodded.  
"Bella, come here. Come meet Jasper and Emmett's brother" the blonde one called to the pained angel.  
"Hi" she whispered shyly once she'd reached us. She didn't look up and I felt bad for her. She must feel so awkward being around people. Good, then she wouldn't know me when I said the song I was about to sing was for her.

After we stood there for twenty minutes, Bella looked very uneasy. She still hadn't looked up and when I said I better get going she didn't even say goodbye.  
"Why didn't you look at him? He's gorgeous!" I heard the blonde one, who I now knew was named Rosalie said to Bella.  
"I felt really awkward being there" Bella whispered and my heart sank. _Poor pained angel._

"Hey, so is this the last time we see you till your gig next week?" Jasper asked as I got into my car.  
"Yep, sorry boys. I've got gigs to do. I'll see you in four days though" I smiled and took off in my beautiful car. I loved it. It was a black Mazda M3 and it drove like a dream.

I was a new town for our next gig and the crowd was going wild. I still hadn't perfected the song I was writing Bella.  
"Are you ready for this party to start?" I screamed into the microphone and the crowd shrieked in excitement. The adrenaline was purely surreal and I started belting out some serious tunes.

"Ok, I wrote this song a few days ago, it's about my parents" I said in merely a whisper and the crowd automatically went silent.

"_I know I wasn't perfect,  
I know it wasn't fair,  
I know I never really had time to tell you,  
I really needed you there,  
But now that you're gone,  
I need you more than ever,  
But my brothers and I,  
Are working hard together._

_We try to be everything we're not,  
to cope with each day as it comes,  
but when we whisper something,  
the memories hit us like a rock,  
and we cry again,  
we miss you. _

_I know we couldn't help it,  
it was unavoidable,  
it's hard to say goodbye,  
to the ones that made you full,  
but we try to get by,  
and we try to smile,  
but sometimes it's just so hard,  
so we just get sad for a while._

_We try to be everything we're not,  
to cope with each day as it comes,  
but when we whisper something,  
the memories hit us like a rock,  
and we cry again,  
we miss you. _

_We know it's not the same anymore,  
we know you're not coming back;  
we know it's hard to keep the balance,  
but we're doing good not to crack. _

_We try to be everything we're not,  
to cope with each day as it comes,  
but when we whisper something,  
the memories hit us like a rock,  
and we cry again,  
we miss you._

_Mummy and Daddy,  
it's over now,  
and we miss you"_ I whimpered the last part and the crowd erupted and to cries and whistles.

"Rest in peace guys" I said and hung my head low. I always finished a concert like this and it always got me more tips, but I wasn't in it for the moment, I was in it for my parents. They'd always believed in me when I was aspiring to be a musician and they died trying to help me fulfill my dream, so I owed it to them that I was living my dream.  
"Thank you and goodnight!" I said and walked off the stage. When I got back to my room I saw my brothers standing there.  
"We couldn't miss it bro. And mum and dad would be so proud of that song" Emmett whispered and threw himself at me. He hugged me and I hugged back. When everything else hurt, we could always count on each other's love.

I went back to the hotel and brought Em and Jazz with me. I didn't exactly want to be alone tonight. I suddenly got an inspiration for a tune and the chorus. Now I had the whole song together.  
"Guys, you want to hear the song I've made for Bella?" I said and they nodded.  
"Yeah man, we need to approve" Emmett chortled and I threw my shoes at him.  
"Ok, here goes nothing" I breathed as I picked up my guitar. I started playing the notes that flowed freely through my head and both their eyes widened when I began with the lyrics.

Once I'd finished they both stood up and gave me a standing ovation.  
"She'll love that man!" they cheered in unison and I raised my thick alabaster brow questioningly at them.  
"Uhm, she'll love it Eddie; she really will" Jasper said after clearing his throat awkwardly.  
"Listen man we have to go" Emmett said and I nodded.  
"Yeah, we didn't actually tell Carlisle and Esme that we were coming" Jasper laughed nervously and I stared, my mouth agape.  
"You need to be way more responsible than that, guys!" I hissed. They both ducked their heads and nodded. I all but kicked them out the door and went to my bed. I flopped down onto and was consumed by dreams of speeding cars and laying in a hospital bed; all with the frightening image of my mothers' bloodied face staring blankly at me.

When I woke up, I had tears trailing down from my eyes to the pillow. My lips were trembling and I broke down. I sobbed for hours and hours and then I pulled out my phone. I dialed my mother's mobile number and when her answering machine spoke, my heart, felt whole for just a second, before I remembered that she was gone.

'_Hello, you've reached Elizabeth Cullen. I'm afraid I can't come to the phone right now; I'm probably off with one of my boys. Leave a message and I'll get back to you_' I heard in my mothers' sweet voice and I was broken hearted. When the button sounded I could only think of one thing I wanted to say to her.

'I miss you mummy…'


	3. Pretty Pained angel ExB POV's

**There you go Kim, another chapter. Haha and tell your dad to be careful when he plays Wii *nods*. Or… maybe just don't let him use nunchuck controllers *laughs*. Lol. Ok guys, I hope you like this one as well!  
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EPOV  
That song has been stuck in my head all week. I can't stand it any longer. I need to actually sing it to other people who aren't my band. I just want to see her reaction. _The pained angel.  
_"Edward, we have to go now man, our flight is leaving in twenty minutes" my drummer said. I nodded and headed towards the door with my les Paul acoustic; god I love it.

I sat on the plane just thinking about seeing those agonized eyes again, and I knew deep down, that when I did, all I'd want to do was take her pain away. I knew exactly how she felt; I just hope she doesn't go to extremes in the mourning like I do. I still haven't finished mourning for my parents; it's hard to forget the people who you grew up loving.

"We will be landing in Phoenix, Arizona in approximately twenty minutes" the voice over said and I breathed a sigh of relief.  
"About god damned time" the bass player said and I chuckled.  
"Yeah, I can't wait to see her eyes when I sing for her" I whispered and they all looked at me.  
"We didn't know you wrote the song for a girl Edward" they all accused and I rolled my eyes.  
"My brothers asked me to. She just lost her parents" I said and their eyes all grew soft.  
"That sucks" the drummer whispered and I nodded.

Around fifteen minutes later the hostess came around checking everyone's seatbelts, but when she got to me, she stopped.  
"Edward? Is that really you?" she whimpered and I was puzzled. _This woman knows me?  
_"Yes, and who are you?" I said, confused. She looked hurt.  
"Edward, I'm your cousin Andi. You're Aunt Esme's daughter" she whispered and my heart sank. Then, I remembered everything.  
"Andi, hey how are you? I haven't seen you since…" I trailed off when I got goose bumps from the memory.  
"Since the funeral" she finished my sentence and I nodded.  
"Well, it's been good seeing you" I smiled and she nodded sadly. She then continued to check everyone else's seatbelts.

When the plane landed and jumped off it and went to meet my brothers.  
"You'll never guess who I just saw on the plane" I whispered to them once I got to the terminal.  
"Who bro?" Emmett said cheerfully.  
"Andi Mason" I whispered and at first Jasper froze and Emmett looked confused.  
"Isn't that our cousin?" Emmett finally said and I nodded.  
"Why is she here? Esme can't be near her" Jasper whispered and I nodded, remembering all the things I'd remembered just ten minutes ago.  
"She's a flight attendant" I said and Jasper relaxed a little.  
"I swear to god if she tries to kill Esme again" Jasper hissed and I put a restraining hand on his shoulder.  
"I won't let her near Esme" I hissed and he relaxed again.  
"Come on man, we're going to help you set up for tonight" Emmett said, playfully punching my shoulder.

We went to the club that the gig was being held in. It was a youngsters club so people under 18 of course could come.  
"Are you ready to sing for Bella?" Jasper whispered and I nodded.  
"Her eyes have been stuck in my head all week Jazz, it's really hard to concentrate when all I can think of is the pain she's going through" I mumbled and Jazz nodded.  
"Yeah, every time Alice says her name, I close in on myself and think about when it was us going through it" he whispered and looked away.  
"Let's just have fun tonight okay? Let's not dwell on things that are out of our control" I whispered and Jazz nodded. I pulled him in for a brotherly hug and he accepted quickly. We all needed each other and depended on eachother greatly. It was hard when you were the only three charity cases in your whole family.

"Dude, I think people are starting to come in" Emmett whispered at about 7 o'clock. I told them to be quiet so I could listen and sure enough, I heard the familiar roar of excited voices.  
"Let's go out there in ten minutes" I whispered and continued eating my fries.

Sure enough, ten minutes later, the club was packed tight.  
"Ok guys, are you ready to hear some serious music?" the club caretaker wailed into the microphone and was answered my screamed and whistles.  
"Okay then, please welcome 'NO TAKERS!' he screamed and we ran out onto the stage.  
I didn't see the pained angel anywhere; or her sisters.  
"Okay, hello Phoenix. How are you all doing tonight?" I said into the microphone and was answered my cheers and squeals. Then, I saw them walk through the door. Bella was curled in on herself and looked very awkward standing there. Alice, the pixie like girl, grabbed her arm and pulled her through the crowd until they were standing directly in the centre.

"Okay, this is a new song I wrote last week" I whispered.

BPOV  
"Okay, this is a new song I wrote last week" he whispered into the microphone. He was glorious, beyond words! He had messy bronze hair and a smile to die for. He was wearing black skinny jeans, an open black button up short sleeve shirt to reveal a white singlet that hugged his figure perfectly.  
"It's for the pained angel. It's called, 'I'll Run" he whispered and then he looked directly at me and…_winked?_

He began playing the guitar he was holding. Was that… _was that a les Paul acoustic? _What a beautiful guitar! The notes were perfect. He closed his eyes and began singing.

'**I can see it in your eyes, you're scared  
All these things they force you to do aren't fair  
I'm here to chase away these tears  
And baby we can chase away these fears**

(Because)sometimes baby you fall on your back  
But girl you're three times the lady I'll ever have  
And you know, you know it's true, he locked eyes with me when he said this and didn't let them go until the end of the song.**  
This is a fight I refuse to lose**

And I'll run (and I'll run)  
Have a little faith in me  
You're scared and alone  
And I'll run (and I'll run)  
This is where we both break free  
I'll bring you home (you home, you home)

I can hear it in your voice, you care  
Let me run my fingers through your hair  
I'll keep you company at night  
And baby I'm here to make this right

(Because) sometimes baby you fall on your back  
But girl you're three times the lady I'll ever have  
And you know, you know it's true  
This is a fight I refuse to lose

And I'll run (and I'll run)  
Have a little faith in me  
You're scared and alone  
And I'll run (and I'll run)  
This is wear we both break free  
I'll bring you home (you home, you home)

[:Bridge:]

Believe me and don't think twice  
And don't leave me or say goodbye  
Believe me, believe me tonight  
Believe me and dont think twice  
Believe me

And I'll run  
Have a little faith in me  
You're scared and alone

And I'll run (and I'll run)  
Have a little faith in me  
You're scared and alone  
And I'll run (and i'll run)  
This is where we both break free  
I'll bring (i'll bring) you home (you home, you home)

Have a little faith in me  
Have a little faith in me (have a little faith, have a little faith)  
Have a little faith in me (have a little faith, have a little faith)  
If you have a little faith in me'. I clapped and he smiled at me. I smiled back and felt that somehow, he was singing the song _to me. _

After the concert, Alice and Rose dragged me backstage.  
When we got back there, the bronze hair god looked up at me and smiled a crooked smile that took my breath away.  
"That was a very well done performance" I smiled and he walked over to me.  
"I'm Edward. We met the other day, but you didn't look at me once" he chuckled and I blushed.  
"Oh, that was you?" I mumbled and he smiled. He nodded and my cheeks went a furious red.  
"That is a lovely blush you have" he whispered and I blushed even darker.  
"Thank you" I mumbled and looked down.

"Edward, who's your friend?" One of the other men, the one who I recognized as the drummer chuckled.  
"This is Bella, you know…" he said in a suggestive tone and I was puzzled.  
"You know what?" I whispered and he turned back to me.  
"Uhm, can we talk for a second?" he whispered and I nodded slowly.

He led me out the back of the night club and it was cold.  
"Here" he whispered and I turned to see his take of the shirt he was wearing. E handed it to me before I could object. I put it on and… my god he smelled wonderful.  
"So, what did your friend know?" I muttered and he ran his hand through his hair and I felt the urge to do the same. What the hell?  
** "**Um, I don't even know how to phrase it" he mumbled and I looked at him questioningly.  
"Just spit it out Edward" I whispered and his emerald eyes caught mine, dazzling me momentarily.  
"You are the pained angel" I he whispered and I froze. He _was _singing the song to me.  
"You wrote that song for me?" I whispered and he nodded.  
"I saw your eyes last week at the mall, and they were stuck in my head all week. I know what you're going through. I went through it too. It's just, when I saw your eyes, I just wanted to take all the pain out of them" he mumbled and looked away afterwards.

I had tears blurring my vision and I started to cry.  
"Oh no, Bella, I'm sorry I didn't mean to bring it up" he whispered and threw his arms around me. I didn't even know him, but it felt so nice to be in his arms.  
"No, no, no, don't apologize" I whimpered after I'd stopped sobbing.  
"Why are you crying?" he whispered.  
"You don't know me, but you wrote one of the most beautiful songs I've ever heard about me" I whimpered and he smiled at me.  
"It was nothing" he insisted but I didn't agree.

"Bella where are you?" I heard Alice calling and I let go of him. I slipped his shirt off and gave it back to him. I turned away but his arm stopped me.  
"I'll see you at school tomorrow" he smiled and my heart sped up. Then, I leant forward and kissed his cheek.  
"Thank you" I whispered and I ran inside.

"Bella, where the hell have you been?" Alice said and had her finger pointed toward me in a stern way with her other hand on her hip.  
"I was outside talking to Edward" I said and her eyes lit up.  
"Oh, okay, I see how it is" she chuckled and pulled me towards the car.

We drove home in silence and when they dropped me off at my house, I felt chipper.  
I walked into the house singing for some reason…  
"You know, you know it's true, this is a fight a refuse to lose" I sang and then the kitchen light turned on.  
"Bella, you're singing?" Aunt May whispered and I stopped. I remembered singing so I just nodded. She rushed over and hugged me.

"You're mother would be so proud of you Bells" she whispered.

**Ok, the song is 'I'll Run' by The Cab. AWESOME SONG! Download it and imagine Edward singing it… sigh.**

**So that's it guys! I hope you liked that chapter! DON'T STRESS the story isn't over lol. So... Uhm, review and stuff! Yeh haha. Yeh I know I don't talk like I write lol. But what can u expect? I'm nearly 15! Haha**


	4. I can't do it on my own ExB POV's

Hey guys! Sorry I didn't update earlier. I really am. Um, yeah, this is this chapter and I hope you like it.

BPOV_  
__'__I can see it in your eyes, you're scared  
All these things they force you to do aren't fair  
I'm here to chase away these tears  
And baby we can chase away these fears _

_(Because)sometimes baby you fall on your back  
But girl you're three times the lady I'll ever have  
And you know, you know it's true__,' _he locked eyes with me when he said this and didn't let them gountilthe end of the song_.__  
'This is a fight I refuse to lose _

_And I'll run (and I'll run)  
Have a little faith in me  
You're scared and alone  
And I'll run (and I'll run)  
This is where we both break free  
I'll bring you home (you home, you home) _

_I can hear it in your voice, you care  
Let me run my fingers through your hair  
I'll keep you company at night  
And baby I'm here to make this right _

_(Because) sometimes baby you fall on your back  
But girl you're three times the lady I'll ever have  
And you know, you know it's true  
This is a fight I refuse to lose _

_And I'll run (and I'll run)  
Have a little faith in me  
You're scared and alone  
And I'll run (and I'll run)  
This is wear we both break free  
I'll bring you home (you home, you home) _

_[:Bridge:] _

_Believe me and don't think twice  
And don't leave me or say goodbye  
Believe me, believe me tonight  
Believe me and dont think twice  
Believe me _

_And I'll run  
Have a little faith in me  
You're scared and alone _

_And I'll run (and I'll run)  
Have a little faith in me  
You're scared and alone  
And I'll run (and i'll run)  
This is where we both break free  
I'll bring (i'll bring) you home (you home, you home) _

_Have a little faith in me  
Have a little faith in me (have a little faith, have a little faith)  
Have a little faith in me (have a little faith, have a little faith)  
If you have a little faith in me__'._

I woke up with a smile on my face for the first time in weeks. But then, I felt ill. I shouldn't be smiling. That song had been stuck in my head all night and I was thankful to Edward for writing it for me. It still baffled me he could write a song that beautiful about me, plain old Bella.  
"Bewwa are you up yet?" I heard Zach call from behind my door. I smiled and sat up.  
"Yes Zach" I called back and then the door flung open. Zach waltzed in wearing a cowboy suit that Mum and Dad had gotten him for his last birthday. His cowboy hat was slightly off to the side and I started laughing.  
"Well howdy Partner" I chuckled as he walked in with his hands as fake guns.  
"I chawwenge you, do u douw" he said and I laughed.  
"Okay then" I said and went to Mum and Dad's room. It hurt me to be in there, but I needed to help Zach right now. He was feeling lonely. I took a deep breath and walked over to Dad's wardrobe. It always confused me that he had it, but I pulled out his Cowboy hat and boots. I put them on over my pajamas and ran back to my room.  
Zach turned around and his face went from happy to sad. His eyes pooled with tears and his bottom lip trembled. I threw off the hat and boots and rushed over to him.  
"Zach, I'm sorry. Are you okay?" I whispered and he just walked over to the hat. He picked it up and hugged it close to him.  
"Can I hab dis Bewwa?" He whispered and I nodded as a tear slid down my cheek. He began to cry as ne nodded. He walked out of the room and I was left on the floor, feeling wretched. I began to whimper as I climbed back into bed.

I picked up my phone and dialed Alice's number.  
"Hello?" she answered, sounding frantic.  
"Hey Alice it's me. I'm not coming to school today. I don't think I can handle it. Okay, bye" I whimpered and then hung up the phone.  
I walked down the stairs only to find out that everyone else had left the house. So, once again, I was alone.

APOV  
Bella hung up the phone and I turned to the rest of the group.  
"Bella's not coming. She sounded really upset" I whispered. Edward's head snapped up and a look of pain crossed his face.  
"Do you know what's wrong with her?" Rose asked and I shook my head.  
"No, she only said that she didn't think she could handle it" I answered and shrugged sadly. I felt so helpless and Edward looked like he was deliberating on something in his mind.  
"What are you thinking bro?" Jasper asked him and he looked up.  
"Huh? Oh nothing. Hey, where does Bella live?" he asked and I smiled slightly. He wanted to go see her, how sweet.  
I told him the address and he nodded in thanks.  
"Sorry guys, I'm missing my first day" he whispered and then he turned and ran.  
"They'll be a great couple" Rose and I whispered at the same time. Emmett and Jasper both nodded in agreement.

EPOV  
I ran as fast as I was able back to the parking lot and on the way I got lost three times. That didn't matter now. What mattered was that the pained angel needed someone, and I wanted to be there for her. And I couldn't quite justify that to myself. Why did I want to be around her already? I met her last night. All I knew was that I needed to help her, or I'd be sick with worry and sadness. I got to my car in record timing and jumped into the driver's seat. I turned on my navigator and spoke Bella's address into it. As I drove, it gave me directions and it seemed to take me forever, but when I pulled up at her house, I looked at the clock. _Had it really only been ten minutes?  
_  
I ran up the stairs to the porch and knocked on her door.

BPOV  
I was moping around in my room when I heard knocking on the front door. I sighed but got up. I didn't even care that I was still in my pajamas or that my hair was crumpled and I had red rimmed, puffy eyes. I walked down the stairs and got to the door. I opened it slowly and saw a face that I had dreamed about all night. When I saw him- and I know this may seem pathetic- I started to cry. I fell to the floor and wrapped my arms around myself while chanting 'I want them back, I want them back'. I was vaguely aware of the fact that he walked inside and sat next to me on the floor. But I was _very _aware of the fact that he wrapped his arms around me.  
"Bella, it's okay. I'm here now" he chanted and my sobbing softened into a whimper.  
"W-W-Why are you here?" I whispered.  
"I came to help you" he whispered and I nodded pathetically. This is exactly what I was- pathetic.  
"You must thing that I'm all kinds of pathetic" I said sadly and he smiled.  
"Actually, I think you're all kinds of wonderful" he counteracted. I stared up at him and he smiled down at me. That was when the phone rang. I huffed and got up. I walked over to the stand where the p[hone was.

"Hello?" I whispered into the line, because if I spoke any louder, my voice would break.

That was when I heard the thing that sent my life into a spiral of black. I was only vaguely aware of Edward calling my name and shaking my shoulders, and then, I was unconscious.


	5. He's gone ExB POV's

**Sorry it's been a while since I updated! I will **_**try **_**and update it more ok?**

**________________________________________________________________________________________________________**

_This can't be happening, this can't be happening._

When I opened my eyes, I was lying in a bed and a horrible beeping nose was sounding. I shuddered because I knew that I was in hospital. But I couldn't be in here; I needed to be with Zach. _Zach._ My heart ached to think of my brother who'd fallen off the jungle gym and was now unconscious in this very hospital. It was then that I noticed that someone was holding my hand. I looked down to see Edward. He was asleep but holding my hand. I was still a little frantic about getting to Zach so I gave Edward a little nudge. When I did, his head snapped up and his eyes were wide with worry.  
"Are you okay? What's wrong?" he whispered urgently and I shook my head.  
"I need to see my brother" I whimpered and he raised an eyebrow awkwardly.  
"Do you want me to call his school or something?" he offered and I closed my eyes tight and shook my head quickly in frustration.  
"No, Edward. He's in the hospital. He's hurt and I need to go see him" I whimpered and his eyes turned sympathetic. He nodded slowly and started to help me out of bed.  
"Wait, how long was I out?" I whispered and he sighed.  
"Only a few hours. You really frightened me" he whispered and my heart stuttered randomly. Why did that happen? When he reached his hand forward and stroked my cheek, my breath got caught in my throat.  
"Zach" I whispered and he nodded grimly.  
He started to help me out of the bed again and I got dizzy all of the sudden.  
"Whoa, steady angel" he whispered and my head snapped toward him. His eyes widened and he mumbled something along the lines of 'I'm sorry'.

When I finally got out of the bed, Edward had his arm tight around my torso. When I asked him why he said that he didn't want me to fall. At the front desk, we asked for Zach's room and were given the directions. When I got there, I whispered my gratitude to Edward and he told me it was nothing. I walked through the door and what I saw sickened me. My little Zach; my baby brother was hooked up to many machines and the only thing telling me he was alive was the steady rise and fall of his chest; as well as the heart monitor. He was so _pale; _but the thing I noticed most was the large bandage around his head. I started to hyperventilate and then I nearly collapsed but I felt strong arms around me.  
"You can do it" I heard Edward whisper and I nodded.  
"Thank you" I whispered and he pushed me forward. I walked hesitantly to my brother's bedside and the tears were sliding down my cheeks.  
"Hey little buddy" I whispered as I took the seat next to his bed and took his hand. Where were my aunt and uncle? "Zach, please wake up" I whispered. When he didn't I tightened my eyes; causing some of the tears to escape.

I spent hours at Zach's bedside and during that time, my aunt and uncle arrived. I couldn't handle seeing my brother that way, so I had to leave the room for a while. When I got back to my room I found Edward asleep on one of the chairs. When I looked over at the clock I saw it was 10 pm. I smiled and walked over to where he was and took the book I noticed was in his hands. I looked down at the page and tears filled my eyes once again.

_Bella  
her eyes are so inviting,  
her smile shines like the sun,  
the pain she suffers from,  
I only hope can be undone,_

_She's like the stars,  
each twinkle could light up the night sky,  
her voice is the music to my ears,  
and her touch is like wildfire._

I smiled to myself and placed the book back in his hands. I felt the sudden urge to run my hands through his hair, so I took this as an opportunity. I ran my hand through his tousled bronze hair and sighed when I noticed how soft it was. I leant forward and planted a kiss on his cheek and when I pulled away he had a smile on his face.  
"Thank you" he whispered and I blushed. His eyes fluttered open and they connected with mine. I stared into his endless emeralds and lost myself in his soul.  
"Bella, you look exhausted. Maybe you should sleep" he whispered and I nodded weakly.  
"I can't thank you enough for everything you did for me" I whispered and his eyes turned sad. Suddenly he took my face in his hands and kissed me softly. A tear slid down my cheek as we kissed gently and sweetly; and all too soon he pulled away.  
"I would do it all again for you; pained angel" he whispered and kissed me once more before leaving the room. I collapsed onto the bed with a smile on my face. I'd only met Edward not long ago, but I knew I was falling. I just hoped he was going to catch me.

EPOV  
I couldn't handle it anymore. I just had to kiss her or I was going to go insane. I didn't know what it was; perhaps it was the desire to take away her pain; I wasn't sure; but her mouth looked so inviting. When I pulled away she had a tear on her cheek, but she was smiling. _And what a beautiful smile she has._  
"I would do it all again for you; pained angel" I whispered and her eyes widened a fraction. I kissed her once more and then I walked out of the room. My heart was thumping erratically and I knew I needed to understand why I felt the need to kiss this girl I'd only just met. But the way she smiled; I knew I was alive because my heart would shift to overdrive. I ran out of the hospital and got into my car. I drove home and ran straight to my room. I decided to take a shower to calm my live wired nerves.  
"It's stupid Edward. You just met her. You can't like her already" I spoke to myself repeatedly and then I jumped in the shower. The boiling water unknotted my shoulders and I shuddered as the relaxation overcame me.

After twenty minutes of the relishing water, I stepped out and dried myself off. After I got changed, I sprayed on some deodorant and walked back into my room from my bathroom. After I layed down at my computer I heard a soft tap at the door.  
"Come on in" I said and then Jasper poked his head in.  
"Where the hell did you go today Edward?" he asked and then I remembered that none of them knew about Bella and her brother both being in hospital.  
"I went to see if Bella was alright" I mumbled and he gave me a knowing smile.  
"Bella aye?" he said arrogantly and I rolled my eyes.  
"It's not like that man. Well, I don't know. It might be now" I mumbled, remembering the kiss we'd shared. When I looked back at Jasper he was raising and dropping both of his eyebrows.  
"So, what happened next?" he asked and I sighed.  
"She got a call saying her brother was taken to hospital and she collapsed, so right now, she and her brother are both lying in hospital beds" I said angrily. Neither of them should be there. I turned back to Jasper again and saw that his jaw had dropped.  
"Is she okay?" he whispered and I looked down.  
"She's scared about Zach" I whispered and he nodded. I felt completely numb, like I could help my Bella with anything. _My _Bella? Where did that come from?  
"I can imagine. I remember when you got taken to hospital, Emmett and i were out of our heads with worry" he said. I laughed.  
"I had the flu Jazz and I was 11. This is a five year old kid who fell off the jungle gym" I said and then I became sad again. When Bella had seen him, she'd collapsed and I had to help her.  
"Still, we were worried. Is her brother alright?" he asked and i shrugged.  
"I don't actually know how Zach is" I answered truthfully and Jasper nodded before closing the door. I heard his footsteps fade away and I took a deep breath; trying to clear my head from the day.

I decided to try and tune my guitar, because I hadn't done anything to it since the gig. As I walked over, I put my phone on charge across the room. I headed to my chair in the corner of my room and picked up my les Paul. I started to strum the chords, making sure they sounded in tune when I heard my phone start to ring I groaned. I put down my les Paul and walked across the room.  
_Bella Calling._

When did she put her number in my phone? And when did she get mine? It didn't matter right now. I pressed the green button and put the phone to my ear.  
"Hello?" I said and I heard sobbing.  
"I-I-I-I don't know w-w-what I'm g-gonna d-d-do" I heard in a sob and I became scared.  
"Bella, what happened?" I whispered and she cried louder.  
"He's all I had l-l-left" she whimpered and I was very confused.  
"Who Bella? What happened?" I asked and she sobbed quietly and it broke my heart to hear her in so much agony.  
"It's Z-z-Zach… he…" she whimpered and then started sobbing again.  
"He what Bella?" I whispered, hoping to god it wasn't what I thought it was.  
"E-E-Edward… he d-d-died…"


	6. Letting the pain sink in ExB POV's

Edward left me in the hospital and I was giddy with joy despite my baby brother being in hospital. I was still worried about Zach but I couldn't stop thinking about Edward. I was almost asleep when I heard the door creak open. I smiled and opened my eyes, and then pouted with confusion when I saw the pained look on the nurse's face.  
"What happened to Zach?" I whispered because I knew that nothing more than hyperventilation and stress was wrong with me.  
"A few minutes ago, he started having a seizure. We scanned him and he had major swelling to the brain. We rushed him to the emergency room, but we were too late" she whispered solemnly. I felt numb.  
"What do you mean you were too late?" I choked and she blinked back tears that were begging to flow.  
"Zach Swan died at 11:42pm tonight" she whispered and my whole world turned into a frenzy of pain and agony. How could Zach die? He was one of the two people keeping me alive right now. He was only five for goodness sake. I was sobbing uncontrollably into my knees when I heard the door shut. I didn't even bother to look up. I was sure that Aunt May was out there now but I couldn't handle anything anymore. I looked up at the roof.  
"How could you do this to me? Why should one person have to experience so much pain?" I wailed and when I got no answer; I felt empty. There was no answer, it was just that I didn't deserve to have the love and support of a family.  
"Oh god, Zach" I whimpered and clutched at my chest where I knew my heart was, but right now it just felt like a weight full of this wretched pain.

I sat there for twenty minutes, crying and bleeding out my tears. I finally decided I didn't want to be alone right now, so I got my phone and dialed Edward's number.  
I put the phone to my ear and waited for a reply.  
"Hello?" I heard his voice and I began to cry again.  
"I-I-I-I don't know w-w-what I'm g-gonna d-d-do" I sobbed again.  
"Bella, what happened?" He whispered and I cried louder.  
"He's all I had l-l-left" I whimpered and he sighed in confusion.  
"Who Bella? What happened?" I sobbed slightly quieter; hearing his voice calmed me down a little, but not enough to stifle my pain.  
"It's Z-z-Zach… he…" I whimpered and then started sobbing again. I couldn't finish that sentence. It made it too final.  
"He what Bella?" he whispered; he sounded like he had an idea, but was hoping he was wrong.  
"E-E-Edward… he d-d-died…" I whispered and a shriek of despair ruptured through my sodden chest.  
"Oh god, Bella" I heard in whisper and I cried again.  
"Can you come here? I don't want to be alone" I whimpered and his breathing hitched.  
"You want _me _there?" he whispered and I sobbed again.  
"I both want and _need _you here" I whimpered and I heard his sigh.  
"I'll be there as soon as I can. I promise" he whispered and then the phone line went dead.

I layed there for an immeasurable moment; just crying and letting the sobs rack through my agonized body. My heart beat achingly and I remembered my family. That was all I could do now; remember. Suddenly, I was in a pair of arms and they were arms that I'd been longing for.  
"Edward" I whimpered as I turned and layed my head against his chest. I began to cry again when I thought about how just hours ago, I'd been sitting with my little brother; and he'd been alive.  
"It's okay. Let it out. I'm here" he whispered and stroked my back and hair. I sobbed inconsolably and he just continued to coo that everything would be alright and that he'd always be there for me. It made me the slightest bit optimistic that I had Edward with me.  
"He's gone. Every one of them is gone" I whimpered and his eyes tuned sad.  
"I'll never leave you Bella" he whispered and my heart stuttered violently.  
"You might not have a choice" I whimpered and he looked at me in confusion.  
"What are you talking about?" he begged and a tear slid down my pain covered cheek.  
"Do you think Zach wanted to die?" I whispered and he seemed to understand.  
"As long as I'm alive, I will never leave your side" he whispered and fresh tears burned at the raw flesh on my cheeks.  
"Thank you" I whimpered and my bottom lip quivered.  
"I should be thanking you" he whispered and I hiccupped.  
"Why?" I whispered. He looked down at me and smiled.  
"For making today worth living" he sighed and I nuzzled my head into his chest.

EPOV  
Today was a horrible day for my Bella. _My _Bella?  
"Edward…" I heard an indistinct whisper and I looked down and saw that Bella was asleep. A small smile was gracing her lips and my heart thumped unevenly. "Thank you Edward. You're the only thing I live for…" she whispered and my stomach burned. She was dreaming of me and saying how I was the only reason she lived. I hadn't known Bella for long, but there was this feeling in the pit of my stomach that I knew I couldn't ignore. I remember once there was a segment of statistics saying that people can fall in love in 8.25 seconds: and I knew I was one of them. I didn't know how it happened; but something drew me to Bella. Something about her tortured soul and I wanted to fix it. I wanted to make her feel alive again; rather than a shred of agony walking amongst the rest of the world.  
"Edward… I love you…" she mumbled and rolled over to lie on my chest fully.  
"I love you too Bella. It seems impossible to me" I whispered as I stroked her hair. I fell asleep with my love on my chest and my heart on my sleeve.

"_Jasper, get off me! I can't breathe" I laughed as Jasper was tackling me for the x-box remote.  
"I'm hungry" Emmett announced and I rolled my eyes while still struggling against Jasper.  
"Em… you're always hungry" I stated and his face fell. It was priceless; he looked like a kid who just got told he couldn't have any candy.  
"But… but Eddie, I want food" he said; looking honestly hurt and both Jasper and I burst out laughing.  
"Go get some then" Jasper suggested and Emmett's face lit up. He hugged Jasper (yes, hugged Jasper) and stuck his tongue out at me. Emmett skipped into the kitchen and I heard the fridge open.  
"Mum got chocolate!" he squealed joyously and Jasper and I both chuckled. When the phone started ringing Jasper stopped tackling me to answer it. He pranced over to the phone and picked it up.  
"'Yello?" he asked casually and his face transformed into a mask of horror. He dropped the phone and collapsed to the floor. I jumped up form my bean bag and ran to the phone.  
"Hello?" I whispered frantically and I heard sirens wailing in the background.  
"Edward, honey it's me. Aunt June" I heard and she sounded agonized.  
"What's the matter Aunt June?" I whispered, frightened and she exhaled shakily.  
"You're mum and dad… they're…. they're dead Edward" she whispered and my life went into a spiral of fear and doubt. Mum… Dad…_

_Gone._

I shot up in the bed and only then did I remember the pained angel sleeping on me.  
"Edward, are you ok?" she whispered frantically and I turned my tortured gaze to her. My heart was thumping erratically but slowly calming down. I pulled her close to me and buried my face in her hair as she traced she crevasses on my arms. It was then that I felt the wetness on my chest. I pulled away for a second and saw that Bella was crying again. My heart sank and when she looked at me she tried to smile reassuringly but it distorted itself into an agony stripped quiver and she crashed her face into my chest.  
"I'm s-s-sorry" she sobbed and I stroked her hair while whispering sweet nothings into her ear.

BPOV  
Ever since I was little; I'd worn two necklaces around my neck and each had a key on it. They were both decorated with the words 'I will love you forever'. My mum had told me that they were the keys to my heart and that I was to keep one; and give the other one to the boy of my dreams. Once; I'd seen a statistic that people fell in love in less than nine seconds of meeting someone; and I was one of them. I knew Edward felt something towards me and that he was the only person who would stick by someone who was as pathetic as I was. He stroked my hair and let me sleep on his chest while staining his clothes with my pain. He kissed me and last night; he told me he loved me when he thought I was sleeping and I'd said I loved him. I couldn't believe it had only been a matter of days and I'd fallen madly; desperately in love with him. He was there through some of my darkest moments and he still stuck around; stayed by my side.

"Edward?" I whimpered and wiped some of my tears away. He looked up and raised his hand; brushing away the tears I'd missed.  
"Yes love" he said and then cringed. "Yes Bella?" he asked and I smiled. I leant forehead and placed a chaste kiss on his lips.  
"Thank you" he whispered and I smiled slightly; despite my situation. I put my hands up behind my neck and undid my necklace with my extra key on it. I brought it down and slipped off one of the keys. I handed it to Edward and he took it; puzzled.  
"What's this?" he whispered and I smiled. I took the necklace from his hands and leant forward to fasten it around his neck.  
"It's the key to my heart".


	7. Let's go home Bella ExB POV's

**Here is the next chapter guys.  
Dedicated to Kimmo and Amy. Thanks for reading (:  
Kim- I'll cut you with my neighbors! Wait.. what?  
Amy- You noob (: ilyyy.  
Read on my lovelies (:  
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BPOV**  
**All though I was sleeping in the arms of the man that I love; I still felt empty. Yesterday had been the day that all the walls I'd built to protect my broken soul came crumbling down. Silent tears slid down my cheek and I began to sob quietly into Edward's chest. I didn't think I was shaking that badly until I felt Edward's arms wrap themselves tightly around me.  
"Let it all out" he whispered and I wailed into his chest. All he did was stroke my bag and hold me while I cried my life away. My heart couldn't possibly beat if I lost anyone else: if I lost Edward. He whispered sweet nothings to me as I let my pain flow like a torrent from my eyes. When I was nearing the end of my whimpering; he stroked my hair. I pulled back to look at him and his eyes were full of pain.  
"Are you okay?" I whispered and some surprise was added to the pain in his emerald orbs.  
"You want to know if _I'm _okay?" he asked and I nodded sadly.  
"Bella; I'm fine. It just really hurts that you are in so much agony. I just wish I could help you in some way" he said and he sounded agonized. I reached my hand up and caressed his face with it. He leaned into my touch and inhaled deeply.  
"You have done more than I deserve" I whispered and his eyes fluttered open.  
"I haven't done anything" he argued and I rolled my eyes.  
"How can I possibly describe all that you have done for me?" I asked; more to myself but I still addressed him. I closed my eyes and some extra tears made their escape. I thought for what seemed like hours and then I knew the exact words I could say.  
"Edward; my family… they're gone. They left me and they never had any other choice. But you; you stayed with me when I needed someone and oyu didn't even know me. You sang me a song and helped me smile for the first time in months and you fell in _love _with _me_. No one has ever done more for me than you have" I whispered and a tear slid down his beautiful cheek. "Please don't cry" I whimpered and he shook his head.  
"I love you" he whispered in a breath and took my face in his hands. His lips brushed against mine and then they came down harder. It wasn't a hot, fiery kiss that so many people feel the need for. It was a kiss full of pain and acceptance. In his lips I could understand his silent message that he was never going to let me go; and that was more then I could ever need.

"Bella, honey are you awake?" I heard a familiar whisper and I opened my eyes and noticed that my cheeks were wet with fresh tears.  
"Aunt May?" I asked groggily and she walked into the room. It was still daylight and I looked down to see that Edward's jaw was slack and his breathing was deep and even. As I watched him; his face contorted with pain and a tear slid down his cheek; and then he relaxed again. It was heartbreaking to see that he was hurting; and it was even worse knowing that I caused that pain.  
"How are you?" Aunt May asked and I turned my gaze to her. She looked like a mess. Her brown hair was matted into a loose pony tail at the base of her neck and her eyes were blood shot and ringed with red.  
I thought about her question. How _was _I? I could only think of one answer.  
"I feel like a part of me has died" I whimpered and the tears fell free again. She ran over to me and sat on the bed carefully; not wanting to jostle Edward. She took me into her arms and together; we let out as much of the pain as we could. She cried and whispered sweet nothings into my ear and I sobbed and stained her shirt with my tears.  
"Why did he take them all?" I whimpered and Aunt May pulled back to look at me. She knew I wasn't a big believer in God; but I knew that she was.  
"Everything our lord does; he does for a reason" she said firmly but her voice broke at random intervals. She stared into my eyes and it looked like she was looking for something worth telling me.  
"What do you want Bella? Let me see what oyu want" she whispered.

Aunt May had always believed that she could read what a person wanted most just by looking in their eyes; and most of the time she was right.  
"Bella…" she gasped and I blinked. She looked… astonished?  
"What?" I whispered and she blinked three times. "What did you see?" I begged as her gaze went unwavering.  
"Him" she said and pointed to Edward. "All I see is him". My heart gave a little jerk. Edward was all I wanted. Normally; she could see more than one thing; but for me; all she saw was the truth. He was all I wanted. I wanted him more then I wanted air to breathe, more then I wanted life; I wanted Edward. He _was _my life now. I couldn't handle it if I lost him; I was hanging on a thing wire as it was. The tears slid down my cheeks as I thought of how much Edward meant to me. In the short time I'd known him; I had falling desperately in love with him. He _was _my oxygen; he was my heart.  
"He's amazing" I whispered and her eyes melted.  
"He seems that way, doesn't he?" she said; smiling as genuinely as possible.  
"Yes, I love him" I whispered and she smiled sadly.  
"Take care of the ones you love Bella. Because you know better than I do; that in the blink of an eye… they could be gone" she said and choked on the word 'gone'. I started cry burst through my lips and Aunt May embraced me once more. I didn't want to feel the agony rip through me like a wild hurricane. I wanted my mum and Dad back. I wanted my little brother to say my name incorrectly like he always did. I wanted to feel at _home_.  
"I want them back" I whimpered. "I want them so much it hurts" I sobbed and she ran a comforting hand down my back. Then; I felt another hand stroke my hand and I pulled away and glanced at Edward. His eyes were full of sadness and regret and I crashed into him.  
"I'll leave you two alone" Aunt May whimpered and walked out of the room. I sobbed uncontrollably into Edward chest and I felt horrible.  
"I'm sorry" I whimpered and he pulled my chin up to look at him.  
"Don't apologize" he said sternly and I looked away from his intense gaze.  
"I cry too much" I whispered and he shook his head.  
"Cry on me as much as oyu need; anything to help relieve your pain" he whispered.

EPOV  
I played with the key that was around my neck. _The key to Bella's heart._ I can't believe she is going through this. She's lost her parents and her brother and she apologizes to me for cryin too much! She was too selfless and self sacrificing.  
Right now; Bella was sleeping and whimpering n her slumber. I wanted to yank her out of it; but just moments ago, the nurse had come to say that Bella could get released when she woke up. SO I was relishing in the moments that I have her in my arms.

Bella stirred and at first I thought she'd woken; but then I looked down and her face was not the face I wanted to see. She looked so agonized in her unconscious state and her bottom lip was quivering.  
"Bella, wake up" I whispered but she didn't budge.  
"Edward, they're gone" she whimpered and in her sleep and then a river of tears leaked from her precious eyes. I couldn't handle the way her voice cracked and trembled when she whispered of her loss. I shook her shoulders gently and when she woke up; a look of relief mixed with agony washed over her features.  
"Are you ready to go home?" I whispered and her eyes brightened for a fraction of a second and then her face fell again.  
"There is nothing left for me there" she whispered and my heart broke all over again.  
"Do you want to come… with… me?" I asked and a smile played on the corners of her lips.  
"Please" came through in a whisper and I smiled at her.  
"Your wish is my command" I answered and she closed her eyes momentarily.  
"When?" she asked; her eyes still shut.  
"Right now" I smiled and her eyes opened wide.  
"_Now_?" she asked and I nodded.  
"A nurse came while you were sleeping and said that you could go as soon as you woke up" I grinned at her and for the first time in days; my angel smiled at me.  
"Thank you Edward" she breathed and I hugged her closer to me.  
"Ok, come on Bells. Up and at 'em. Let's get you home" I smiled and her eyes welled up in tears.  
Tears spilled over the edges and she buried her face in the pillow beside her.  
"Bella, are you okay?" I whispered and she looked up at me with regret plaguing her features.  
"I'm sorry. I'm being stupid" she whimpered and I rolled my eyes.  
"Bella, please tell me so I can refrain from doing it in the future" I begged and she stared at me; dumbfounded.  
"I don't want you to stop" she whispered and I raised an eyebrow at her. "My Mum was the last person to call me Bells" she whispered and I felt my heart sink.  
"I'm sorry" I whispered, "I won't do it again" I finished and she shook her head vigorously.  
"Edward, please. I need the memories" she whispered and I couldn't deny the way her eyes told a million painful stories and that I could see right to the depths of her soul and see that she needed to remember so that she couldn't handle forgetting.  
"Ok Bells" I started, "I'll help you remember" I whispered and she smiled gracefully.  
"You're a god send" she whispered and I chuckled.  
"Bella, if anyone was sent from heaven it was you. You just happened to fall from grace" I stated and she stared at me for a second before speaking.  
"I'm still falling" she mumbled and I smiled.

"And from here on out; I'll be waiting to catch you".

**So, what did oyu guys think?  
It made me cry… :/. I know I'm the author, but I always cry when something is emotional. I'm sorry, I HAD to put some sweet stuff in there (:**


	8. The funeral ExB POV's

**Sorry for making you wait!!!! Well, I hope this is worth the wait. Read the authors note down the bottom. VERY IMPORTANT!!!! Ok, read the chapter first though (:**

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I walked and walked. No matter how happy I was that Edward was here holding my hand; I still had the constant void that told me I'd be the only one of the Zach's immediate family to attend his funeral. What was worse; is that I was the only one left. We walked around the cemetery until I saw a coffin looming on the ground. It was a beautiful coffin; as far as coffins go. It hurt me so badly to know that my little brother was inside it. I whimpered as Edward and I approached it and he gave my hand a gentle squeeze.  
"I'm here" he whispered and those two words melted away any insecurity I had. Now all I had was the numbing ache that my family left behind.  
"Thank you" I whispered and he let out an exaggerated breath.  
"Maybe I shouldn't be here" he whispered and I felt the panic rise in my throat. I started to sob and threw myself into his chest.  
"Edward; oh Edward I can't do this without you. I am barely standing; I'm only being brave enough to get through this _with _you. You're all I have left" I whimpered as he gently stroked my hair.  
"Okay, I'll stay" he mumbled and I kissed his shirt repeatedly.

I'd been living with Jasper, Edward and Emmett for a week now; and Alice and Rose seemed to be there all the time as well. I was so thankful for my friends; and mostly for Edward. This is a dark time in my life and it would be even less bearable without them. When I'd first gone home after being in hospital; the first greeting I got was a giant bear hug from Emmett and a gently one from Jasper. Alice and Rose had rushed into the room and taken me in their arms while I'd sobbed my heart out.

"We gather on this dreadful day, to mourn the loss of Zachery Swan. Beloved son, and brother to Renee, Charlie and Isabella Swan. Can we have a moments silence please?" the priest said sorrowfully and my heart jerked out of my chest. This was the second funeral in a month that I'd had to give a eulogy at. As the tears flowed freely I tried to be quiet; but every now and then an agonised whisper ripple from my lips. After the silence, the priest called me up to read. Edward gave my hand a reassuring squeeze before I walked to the front of the loose crowd of people.

And with a deep and shaky breath; I said my last words of my brother.  
"Zach was my little brother. In some ways; he was like a best friend. His innocence and caring ways grew as he did. He never understood my problems; but he always cuddled up to me and listened. When my parents died, I took on the responsibility of helping Zach out with things that normally I wouldn't and our bond grew stronger." Tears slid down my cheeks as my voice shook. "When I heard that Zach had died; my whole world went blank. It was hard to comprehend that I'd lost all I had left. Zach was my safe harbour; he was my favourite person in the whole world; and then; just like my parents: he was gone. I never thought it was possibly to die on the inside; but still be living on the outside; but it is. During my stay at the hospital; I formed an unbreakable bond with someone who has become my strength, my light in the darkness, my heart. He stuck by me when we barely knew each other and he never left my side. So Zach, I promise; with him, I know I'll be okay" I looked up at the sky with a quivering lip and whispered, "I hope you're proud of me little brother" and then I broke down. I sobbed my way over to Edward who had his arms open wide. I practically ran into them and they wound themselves around me; keeping me safe from harm.  
"I love you" I cried into his chest and he kissed the top of my head.  
"I'll always be your light. I'll shine my love for you over everything dark and help guide you back to me" he whispered and my heart melted.

EPOV  
The funeral was two weeks ago. Bella has moped around for those fourteen days and I feel utterly hopeless. Sometimes I walk past her room and hear her sobbing. She has been staying in the guest room and I know that she needs this time alone. I was laying in bed thinking about a way to help her out of this mess when I saw a thin line of light.  
"Edward?" whispered the shaky voice of my angel and I sat up and looked at her.  
"Yes Bella?" I whispered and she came over to the bed.  
"Can you sleep in my room tonight?" she whimpered and then started to sob again. I sat up and engulfed her in a hug. Her shaking body shivered inside my arms and my heart broke in every single place.  
"Of course I can" I whispered and she clung to me.  
"Thank you; for everything" she whispered and I picked her up bridal style as her face was still buried in my chest and carried her back to the guest room.

Bella was asleep by the time I got down the hall with her. She was soundlessly whimpering in my arms as a held her close to me. I laid her down on the bed and tucked the doona around her.  
"Edward" she breathed desperately and I thought she'd woken; but she hadn't. I kissed her forehead; and then each eye, and then I place a chaste kiss on her lips before going to the closet and getting a spare pillow and blanket. I laid down on the couch and closed my eyes and soon; unconsciousness engulfed me in its ragged ray.

When I woke up in the morning, what I saw and felt was amazing. Curled up on my chest with her face in the crook of my neck was Bella. Her breathing was even and unshaken. Her hand was placed over my heart and her other one was hanging limp over the side of the couch. I smile when she nuzzled her head into the crook of my neck and sighed.  
"Bella love?" I whispered and she stirred lightly. She clenched my shirt with her hand and then I felt her gently kissed in my neck.  
"Are you awake?" I whispered.  
"No" she said stubbornly and I chuckled lightly.  
"Are you feeling okay?" I asked and then she brought her head up to look at me. She leant down and kissed me deeply; and filled with love.  
"I am now" she whispered and she broke away. I hugged her close to me and inhaled her scent.  
"Why didn't you sleep on the bed?" I asked while absently playing with a lock of her hair.  
"I needed you" she whispered and I stopped playing with her hair.  
"Why?" I asked; concern lacing my voice.  
"I felt so guilty" she mumbled; looking away.  
"Why did you feel guilty beautiful girl?" I asked; shocked.  
"All I have done all fortnight is cry and mope; and I felt like I'd been neglecting you. Then; I woke up in the middle of the night; and I felt scared that you hated me. So I came over to you and laid with you because I needed to feel loved again" she whispered and then I crashed my lips into hers.

This time; our kisses were desperate and full of sorrow. Every second we'd break apart and take a breath; only to go straight back to the kissing. These kisses were reassurances. I rolled Bella over and the kissing resumed. She entangled her hands in my hair and held my face to hers. After in immeasurable amount of this I moved my kisses to her neck and all I could hear were the sounds of her broken sobs. She constricted her hands around my neck and I stood up on my knees; having my arms wrapped around her waist; bringing her with me. Her head lay limply backwards and I placed a kiss on her neck before I walked us over to the bed.

BPOV  
And that was when we made love.

I know we are only in high school; but it felt so right. It was desperate and intense and passionate and I never wanted it to end. But it had to. I had never felt so loved in my life and I knew beyond reason that Edward was my life; my future; my everything. I rolled over and saw the smiling face of an angel.  
"Hey beautiful" he whispered and I leant forward to kiss him. It was soft and sweet; all the desperation had been burned out of us for now.  
"Hey yourself" I mumbled and then bit my lip. He smiled and stroked my cheek with the gentlest touch; as if I were a feather and would break with the slightest pressure. I laid my head against his bare chest and his fingers danced gracefully across my naked shoulder.  
"I'm sorry" he whispered and I looked up at him; abashed.  
"For what?" I whispered strongly and he looked ashamed.  
"I shouldn't have done that without asking you" he mumbled, looking away and the corners of his lips were turned down.  
"I wanted you to" I whispered and his eyes snapped back to me.  
"You did?" he asked and I smiled and nodded.  
"It was amazing. Thank you" I whispered and pushed myself up to kiss him. His tongue slid across my bottom lip and I opened my mouth eagerly. Our tongues danced gracefully and eventually I pulled back.  
"I just remember I have to do something" I mumbled; frustrated. I rolled over and took one of the blankets to cover my exposed self up. I walked over to the phone that was in the room; in my bed sheet and dialled the number that ached every time I punched it in.  
"Hello?" came the answer after the first ring.  
"Aunt May" I breathed and her breathing hitched.  
"Bella dear, how are you?" she asked and I thought about it for a second. Finally, I had a word for it.  
"Better" was all I said and I could almost picture her expression.  
"That's good sweetheart. Will we be seeing you again tomorrow?" she asked and I smiled slightly despite myself.  
"Yes, and I am bringing someone for you to meet" I said.  
"Oh really? Is it that young man you talked about at the...?" she trailed off and I knew the memory burned her too.  
"Yes, his name is Edward" I whispered.  
"I can't wait to meet him. See you tomorrow Bella" she said and then she hung up. I turned to Edward who had his hands behind his head.  
I walked over and got back into the bed.  
"I love you, you know" I mumbled and I heard his smile.  
"I love you too. Don't ever doubt that".

**What do you think? Review guys! By the way... I love long reviews. And on a sadder note, I don't think story will have much more to go. 6 chapters at maximum. Soooo sorry guys ******

**Love you all xx**

**Bee.**


	9. Too many goodbyes ExB POV's

As Edward walked hand in hand up the porch of the house that I couldn't bear to look at anymore; my heart was pounding achingly.  
"I can't do this" I whimpered and started to turn away but Edward arm caught my waist.  
"You can do this Bella. I love you; I'm here. Don't worry" he whispered in my ear and I nodded weakly. We knocked on the door but there was no answer. We knocked again and still there was no answer. I pounded my fist heavily on the door as my fear crept into my throat and finally I stood back and kicked it open. I frantically searched the house but I couldn't find anything. Eventually I went up to check my parent's room and when I opened the door; I collapsed again. The sobs broke through my chest as darkness engulfed me once again.

EPOV  
I hated this. How can one person handle so much grief? Three days ago when Bella and I had gone to her house for me to meet her Aunt; we searched the house and eventually we found her aunt dead on the floor of her parents' bedroom. Her heart was resting limply on her chest and her eyes were glistening with fresh tears. She hadn't been dead for long. My father had been a doctor and a few times I'd seen dead people and Bella aunt May was still warm when I went to check her pulse. Bella was unconsciously sobbing and I picked her up.  
"Bella" I whispered and her face contorted into agony. She slowly opened her eyes and when she saw me gazing back at her she tried to smile; but then she broke down again.  
"She's gone Edward" she whimpered and clung to me as she cried into my chest. I felt like crying with her because she was me. We were the other halves of each other. I'd carried her to the front door and awaited the ambulance I'd called and then it came.

Now; I am sitting beside Bella at the funeral and she is getting ready to sing. She'd promised her Aunt May that she'd sing at her funeral a song she'd written when she was fifteen and I'd never heard it or her voice; so I was anxious.  
"And now, Isabella Swan; the niece of May Swan, will now sing a song she wrote when she was fifteen" the priest said and Bella stood shakily. She walked to the front of the crowd and sat at the piano. When she started to play the notes, I started to cry with her.

"Spend all your time waiting

for that second chance

for a break that would make it okay

there's always one reason

to feel not good enough

and it's hard at the end of the day

I need some distraction

oh beautiful release

memory seeps from my veins

let me be empty

and weightless and maybe

I'll find some peace tonight

in the arms of an angel

fly away from here

from this dark cold hotel room

and the endlessness that you fear

you are pulled from the wreckage

of your silent reverie

you're in the arms of the angel

may you find some comfort there

so tired of the straight line

and everywhere you turn

there's vultures and thieves at your back

and the storm keeps on twisting

you keep on building the lie

that you make up for all that you lack

it don't make no difference

escaping one last time

it's easier to believe in this sweet madness oh

this glorious sadness that brings me to my knees

in the arms of an angel

fly away from here

from this dark cold hotel room

and the endlessness that you fear

you are pulled from the wreckage

of your silent reverie

you're in the arms of the angel

may you find some comfort there

you're in the arms of the angel

may you find some comfort here". She whispered the last line as the tears streamed down her cheeks and the whole funeral erupted into sorrowed applause.

Later, Bella also read out a poem she'd written.  
**(This is an original poem)**

BPOV  
I shakily walked up to the front again and stood in front of everyone I knew and everyone my Aunt knew. I took a deep, wispy breath and spoke.

"Do you remember long ago?  
when the whisper was a lie?  
you said you'd always be there for me,  
but that really didn't apply.

It seems that god had other plans,  
ones to make me cry,  
it seems that his other plan,  
was one where you would die.

I've lost everything,  
I've lost my heart,  
I've lost my family,  
and what I else, I can't even start.

The tears are never ending,  
these eyes are rimmed with red,  
as my mother, my father, my brother, my aunt,  
all of you are dead.

I have only one person,  
who is the key to healing my heart,  
and I know that I would die too,  
if we ever were to part.

I still can't imagine,  
I still fail to see,  
what purpose there is,  
in taking you all from me.

I take in a shaky breath,  
because I know I'll be alright,  
even if I have to grief,  
for many days and nights.

And I will grieve for you,  
I will let the tears fall,  
for a life without all of you,  
would have been no life at all.

The night comes as a blanket,  
to forget everything I feel,  
but when morning comes and I wake up,  
everything feels much more real.

But as I breath and I live,  
I let out an agonized sigh,  
but with him here,  
I whisper to you all…'Goodbye'". I finished and rushed off into the nearest bathroom. I curled up into a ball and cried to myself for hours. I could tell because it had gotten dark. Eventually Edward came into the female toilets as if he didn't are; and he nurtured me for hours again until eventually; I'd fallen asleep in his arms.

EPOV  
She was so fragile; so strong; but I didn't know what to do. She was also… very, _very _broken.

**Sooo?... what did you think?**

**That song is called 'Angel' and it's by Sarah McLaughlan.**


	10. The strangest things ExB POV's

**This chapter is for ****LiveAndDontRegretIt, RunswithVampires123, ****k-****pattttttttz, dlpash, rockenweirdo, kaitlin13, GODISAWESOME, LionSparkle and deansgal4life6 ****for reviewing on this story so far!!!! Also to all my other reviewers; I am SOOOO SORRY! My email only goes back to chapter seven. So if you reviewed before this chapter; it's also for you!!!!. Hope you like this chapter guys! Read the authors note at the bottom!**

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I felt sick.

I was sitting on the bathroom floor with my head between my legs and I was scared.  
"Edward, what if it's Swine Flu?" I whispered and his hand paused in rubbing my back.  
"We'll make it through" he whispered.

Ok, here's the story; I'd been throwing up for the past three weeks. I thought I couldn't possibly lose any more of what I ate but no; I was wrong.  
"Bella; I booked you an appointment with the hospital" Jasper said, walking into the bathroom. "Ew, it smells in here" he said and scrunched up his face. I glared up at him and he ran from the room. I heard Edward chuckle softly behind me and I looked up at him but it made me light headed. I swayed right into him and he caught me.  
"Maybe we should ask Jasper when that appointment is" he murmured and I shrugged weakly. He picked me up bridal style and carried me carefully out to everyone else.  
"Bella!" Rosalie shrieked and I stared at her and smiled a genuine smile. I hadn't smiled since it started because it hurt. When I used to get sick; my mum would help em and Dad would get me some lemonade. I didn't dare tell any of them because I knew that they would try and help; but all I needed was to wallow.

I'd finished school just before the nausea started. I didn't dare tell anyone what I thought it was. I just acted like I didn't know; but in truth; I was terrified of how much I knew. I shook as Edward gently put me down. I was starting to feel better; like I always did at this time of the day. This; was yet another clue to the big picture I'd put together. I didn't know if I could do it; I hadn't been prepared; and I sure as hell didn't want to do it by myself.

I started to cry as I contemplated everything I'd been through this past year.  
I'd lost my parents, my brother, my aunt and just recently, I found out my cousin in Australia had been in a p-Plate accident; which is apparently very common. I had also lost… my virginity. I didn't mind the last one all too much because it was with the most amazing boy in the world. And now, I had to deal with _this._

_The next day._

"I'm scared" I said and not because I was afraid of what I might find out I was actually more afraid of having my suspicions confirmed.  
"You'll be okay baby" he whispered and kissed my forehead comfortingly.  
"Isabella Cullen?" I heard and I was shocked. Cullen? I turned to Edward and he smiled sheepishly.  
"I asked Jasper to say it. I hope you don't mind" he whispered and looked away. I put my hand under his chin and he looked at me; Emerald looking into brown.  
"I _love _it. You have no idea how much" I whispered and kissed his mouth. Surprisingly I hadn't had any nausea today; but one thing was surprisingly hard to ignore. I was two and a half weeks _late_.

I stood up and held out my hand and Edward took it quickly. We walked; hand in hand, to where we were going to hear my results. I'd come in yesterday and had the blood test done and was unable to sleep all night.  
I sat at one of the chairs in front of the desk in his office and he sat across us with an unreadable expression on his face. When he saw me he smiled widely and at that moment; I knew I was right and surprisingly; I wasn't upset or scared. I felt… perfect.  
"I knew it" I breathed and Edward turned to look at me. I looked at the doctor and he simply nodded and motioned for me to go ahead.  
"Edward, I'm pregnant" I whispered and his face lit up. He threw himself from his chair and tackled me and threw me into the air before catching me in a passionate kiss.

We drove home in utterly beautiful silence. We were both overjoyed.  
"A baby" he whispered and I smiled and butterflies fluttered helplessly in my stomach.  
"Yeah, a little boy" I whispered and looked lovingly down at my still flat stomach.  
"A boy eh?" Edward said and it was impossible to miss the joy in his voice. I smiled lovingly at my boyfriend and I couldn't escape how strange it was that not even two months in; we're having a baby together. But we'd both known from the second we met each other that we'd be together for as long as we lived. I also couldn't escape the unmistakable joy that was radiating from me.

EPOV  
I couldn't help but smile. I don't care how young I am; I'm having a baby with the woman I plan on spending my life with. Two months doesn't count as short to me; it only counts as the beginning of the rest of my life with her. I'd known within ten seconds of meeting her that I'd love her always; and now she was carrying my child.

We'd decided after much consideration not to tell anyone until three months; that way we would be the only ones aching if it… didn't happen. It was hard for me not telling my family but I knew that it was harder on her; not having any family to share it with. I knew it would be hard on any children Bella and I had; not having grandparents on that side of the family… or my birth parents. Or really anyone for that matter. But they would have me; the best dad in the world, Emmett; a teddy bear of an uncle, Jasper; a calm uncle, Rose; a vain Aunty, Alice; a hyperactive shop-a-holic aunty, me; the best dad in the world. But they were most blessed to have Bella as their mother. She was one of the most loving and compassionate people I'd ever met in my life and she's been through so much heartache. We were flying to a place called Brisbane in Australia to be with her distant relatives after her cousins' recent yet tragic death.

1 ½ months later

I was sitting in my room testing out a new tune I was writing for Bella when I heard sobs coming from the bathroom. I knew who it was and jumped up quickly and burst in.  
"Bella what's wrong" I asked frantically and found her clutching her stomach.  
"I-I-I-I lost him Edward. I'm bleeding. I-I-I-I'm so s-s-sorry" she whimpered and my heart broke in two different places for two different reasons. One- Bella was in agony and Two- We'd lost our baby. I huddled down next to her and held her tight.  
"Shh, Bella, it's okay. We'll try again. I love you" I whispered as her sobs subsided into quiet whimpers. I could handle seeing her like this. She's lost too many people in her life and she just lost her child. How was one person supposed to cope? I saw the blood on her pants and I didn't need any more confirmation than that.

That was three days ago. In the past three days I have never seen Bella more miserable then she has been. It hurt knowing that I couldn't take away her pain.  
"Bella, are you ok? It's just a miscarriage. It happens all the time" I said trying to be reassuring.  
"I know Edward" she said with a weak smile, "I just can't stand the fact that everything I love dies. I didn't have the opportunity to love this baby and it died" she whispered and silent tears strode down her unforgiving cheeks. I leant forward and kissed each tear and I saw something I'd missed terribly. Her smile.  
"I love you" she whispered and I smiled and started to kiss her. I held onto her tightly as we made passionate love. However I could tell it hurt Bella by the look on her face; so it didn't go on for as long as it could have.

"Are you ok?" I whispered in her ear after I kissed away some hair.  
"I'm not sure. That really hurt" she whispered and I sighed. I got out of the bed but she clutched to my arm.  
"Don't leave me" she begged and my heart tore.  
"I'm not beautiful girl. I couldn't ever. Besides; I'm getting changed so I can take you to the doctor" I smiled and she huffed sadly.  
"I don't want to go to the doctor" she mumbled and I kissed the tip of her nose but had to quickly get away before I took it too far again.

I was sitting in the waiting room. The reason I say I was is because Bella wasn't here with me. The doctor had asked to see her by himself. Suddenly the door opened and Bella came out with tears streaming down her face; but something was different about those tears. Maybe it was the fact that they were running down her _smile._ She rushed over to me and engulfed me in a hug. I chuckled slightly and hugged her back.  
"I know why it hurt Edward" she whispered my I felt a tug at my heart. It was guilt.  
"Were you still bleeding?" I asked quietly and felt her shake her head.  
"Not even close" she whispered and her voice broke. I pulled back and looked at her face and there was so much happiness in her eyes.  
"Well then?" I couldn't let myself hope for the impossible.  
"I'm still pregnant" she whispered and I felt my heart soar.

**____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________**

**What did you think?**

Review guys! Hit the review button. It makes my day when I get a good, long review (hint hint)


	11. Don't you love me? All BPOV

**Sorry it's been so long guys! ButI am afraid you guys are gonna hate me once you read it; but remember…READ THE AUTHORS NOTE AT THE BOTTOM!!! It explains stuff. Happy reading guys xx_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________**

It was today. Today I was telling everyone that I was pregnant and I wasn't sure how they would take it considering Rosalie just informed us that she is five months along. I felt like a copycat. I didn't want my friends to think that of me as well."Edward; I don't know if today is really the right time to tell them" I mumbled as we walked hand in hand from the hospital. Today was also the day that I had my routine check up to make sure the baby was fine. However it was my first so I don't really know if you can call it _routine_. "Bella, come on. It'll be fine" He whispered exasperated. I'd been putting this day off for a week now and as of now I was three and a half months along. We'd given it an extra week just to be sure."What if I stutter?" I asked; trying to find any excuse not to do it. Edward stopped in his tracks and glared at me. It was the single scariest, deadly, _hottest_ thing I had ever seen."Why don't you want them to know Bella? Are you ashamed to be having a baby with me?" he hissed and I had to take a step back. I dropped his hand as the tears welled up in my eyes."Never" I whispered ad he laughed humourlessly. "Whatever. Then why do you keep putting off telling everyone? You take the car; I'll find my own way back to the house" he grumbled and stalked away before I had a chance to argue with him. Belligerent tears flowed down my face and I recognized the feeling: _loss_.I drove back to the house in sorrowful silence. I missed Edward like crazy and when I got home; my heart broke twice more. Edward was loading up his car; with s_uitcases_. He was leaving me just like everyone I ever loved had. He heard my car and turned his head to stare at me. As I watched on; his face portrayed, anger, then pain, then anger again. Before I could get out of the car; he'd said goodbye to his family who weren't looking at him; and he was _gone_. I got out of the car with shaky legs and made my way inside whilst avoiding the sympathetic gazes of everyone. Edward had left me just like he'd said he never would.I climbed into our bed and just stayed there; ignoring the searing pain I felt when I breathed in his smell. I cried for what felt like eternity but must have only been a couple of hours. Emmett came and checked on me every once in a while and his gaze held nothing for his brother; but every ounce of sympathy for me. _Great_, I thought miserably, _I'm back to being that type of person_. Eventually; I had to take a shower. I sat on the shower floor and let the water run over me; hiding my tears. When I got out and changed, I looked in the mirror and hated what I saw. I saw the old me; the one who would cry non stop for days because she had lost someone she loved. I'd lost too many people in my life and now I'd lost the one that was supposed to help me bring _another _person into my broken life. I suddenly had inspiration to write a poem; only god knows why.The Aching a poem by Bella Swan. **(Actually; it's a poem by Briony Morgan HAHA! that's me by the way)**I cry weakly for him,because i loved him so much,every cell in my boy is aching,to be back in his warm all the dry tears in the world,I beg him to come back to me,because I miss him profusely,he makes me the girl I want to life contains nothing of interest,it's dead without him here,and it hurts just to breathe,I need him right here.I honestly thought he loved me,that someone I lived what stay,but after I life of sadness I've learned,with happiness there is a price to price to pay was losing,the only man that I love,and I wonder what I did,to anger God above.I miss him so much it hurts,I want him to come home,and without him in my life,I am all Edward please come back to me,these words in this poem are true,I want to have this baby so much,but not as much as I love with that I folded it up and ignored the tear stains that made the paper clear. I put it in an envelope and went downstairs to give it to one of my friends."Hey Emmett?" I asked and was shocked at how raspy my voice sounded."Oh Bella" he whimpered and came to hug me. It wasn't his normal bone crushing hug; it was gentle and loving and made me want to cry. So I did. I cried on Emmett as he stroked my hair and I knew that everyone else was watching."I miss him so much" I whispered once I'd stopped crying."Why did he go Bella?" he asked and without thinking I said it."He thinks I am ashamed to have the baby with him" I said and then mentally smacked pulled back to look at me and he had a look of pure rage on hi face."He left you and you're _pregnant_!?" he bellowed and I nodded weakly. He let go of me and stormed out of the house and then I remembered the poem."Emmett!" I called as I ran after him. He stopped dead in his tracks and turned to look at me."Bella, don't stick up for him. What he has done is unforgivable" he growled and I rolled my eyes."I'm not sticking up for him. I just want you to give him this" I said handing him the envelope and his face softened."You have a good heart Bells. It's just a pity my brother had to break it" he said and took the poem. He walked to his car and got in. Without so much as a glance in our direction he was gone as the difference is; Emmett wasn't leaving his pregnant girlfriend.I was completely numb and cried myself to sleep for days. Edward still hadn't talked to me or come to see me. I hadn't seen him in four days and I was beginning to get desperate. I'd found out that he'd gone to Forks to live with his Aunt and Uncle. _He'd left town to get away from me_. I was laying in my bed listening to one of the saddest songs in the world. And yes; I was crying. I sang along to the sad lyrics which were really only sad if you felt sad already."I'm not a stranger,no, I am anger,and tears that still drip sore.A fragile flamed etched,with when our eyes meet,I know you see.I do not,want to be afraid,I do not,want to die inside,just to breathe in,I'm tired,of feeling so alone,relief exists I find it when,I am cut.I may seem crazy,or painfully shy,and these scars wouldn't be so hidden,if you would just look me in the eye.I feel alone here,and cold I don want,to the only anaesthetic that makes me feel anything,kills inside. I do not,want to be afraid,I do not,want to die inside,just to breathe in,I'm tired,of feeling so alone,relief exists I find it when,I am cut.I am…I am not alone,I am not alone.I'm not a stranger,no I am yours,crippled anger,and tears that still drip sore.I do not,want to be afraid.I do not, want to die Inside,just to breathe in,I'm tired,of feeling so alone,relief exists I found it when.I was cut"I was in hysterics by the end of the song and decided I couldn't do it anymore. This life was meaningless without Edward; without my parents; without _Zach_. I decided to go for a drive and seeing as it was midnight, I could easily sneak into his house. I drove for hours and hours and never once did I stop crying in that time. A few days ago; Emmett had given me directions to the house; 'just as a precaution'. So I followed the directions and I saw it. A huge mansion with a glass wall. I stopped the car and got out and decided to walk around and find his room. As I did so; his was the first I saw. By the looks it was the only bedroom on the ground floor. He was asleep and he looked so peaceful. It hurt my heart to see him only through a window. So; I slowly opened the window and climbed through it. I had my bag of _supplies_ and walked over to him. I kissed each eye lid and tried to ignore the feeling when his lips turned up at the edges."Bella" he breathed and when his breath hit my face; I momentarily forgot what I was doing here. But then I remembered. I walked over to the closet and opened the door and the smell was heavenly. It was _Edward_. I stepped inside and left the door open a smidge so that when he woke up; he would see me. I tied to noose's end around the pole where you hang your dresses or suits. I slipped the circles around my head when it snugly hugged my neck. I stared at him and just as I let myself go; he opened his eyes.

**DON'T KILL ME! BELIEVE ME IT GETS BETTER! This is just setting up for a better story line ( I hope you don't hate me too much. Keep reading; you won't be disappointed. The song is called 'Cut' by Plumb and it is VERY good. And I wrote the poem )**


	12. I can't live without you ExB POV's

**Sorry I havent update in a while! But read on!**

_Bella. Bella. Bella. Bella. My Bella. _Her name resounded in my head like a broken record. I'd _left _her when she was carrying our baby; I only did it because I thought she was ashamed. But I know that isn't any kind of excuse. I'd stayed at my Aunt's house in Forks, Washington and one night I'd been sleeping when I heard a soft, beautiful, _farmilar _whimper. As soon as I'd opened my eyes; I'd seen her. Bella was in my closet stairing lifelessly at me; with a noose around her neck. As soon as she'd seen me she'd let herself fall. As soon as I'd seen that; I launched myself out of the bed and went to her. I threw the closet door open and took her still, fragile form into my arms. I'd begged her to live but she wasn't looking at me. Her eyes were closed and the roped had both burned and cut her neck.I'd screeched out my aunt's name and she had come running in. Her face portrayed fear, compassion and professionalism. And now; here I am; sitting down in the waiting room of the Forks Hospital.

"Edward Cullen?" I heard from within my tortured stupor. I looked up through blurry eyes to see the angry looks of my family and friends. I began to sob and their expressions softened. Emmett came over and put a gentle arm around me. As I cried and wailed and sobbed my heart out; I heard small murmurings. I caught the words 'attempted suicide' and my interest perked. I stared as the nurse conversed with Carlisle Cullen; my uncle. "She tried to hang herself in his closet" Carlisle Murmured and my heart sank two or three extra times. "Oh Doctor Cullen; I am so sorry. Is your son alright?" the nurse asked in a flirtatious way. It made me sick to the stomach that Bella was lying somewhere after trying to kill herself and here was this nurse _flirting _with my _uncle_. "Oh, he isn't my son. My brother Jerome was his father; and he passed away some time ago" Carlisle explained and I felt yet another pain shoot through my aching heart.

It was hours before any of us could see her. It frustrated me to no end to have to sit and wait while I cried for her. I hope the baby was okay also. I hung my head in my hands and cried again when I thought of how pig headed and insensitive I was. "Edward?" I heard Carlisle's voice and I lifted my head slowly. My tears had stained my shirt. "Yes?" I answered in a weak and hoarse voice.  
"You can go in and see her now" he said and my heard thudded painfully from the relief. I nodded numbly and stood without remembering if I told myself to. I made my way through the halls until I got to my angels room. She was laying on the bed and her neck was wrapped in gauze. It was heartbreaking. She was asleep and her face looked pained. I slowly and silently opened the door and then shut it behind myself. I walked over to her; it was like I was an onlooker watching a burning man head towards the love of his life. This was so surreal and yet so painful. "Edward please. I love you" my angel whispered in a choked voice. I stared at her and realised she was dreaming about the day I'd…_left_. I broke down then. My loud sobs wracking through every inch of my body. I threw myself onto the chair that was beside her bed and rested my head next to hers. I took her hand on mine and kissed each knuckle softly while I cried.  
"I'm so sorry; I love you so much" I whimpered.

I fell asleep like that. Holding my angels hand and listening to her shallow breathing. As well as the constant _beep, beep, beep _of the monitor. I woke up to the feeling on my hair being stroked. It was amazing and the only person who stroked it like that was Bella. I slowly opened my eyes and saw that she was staring straight into them. She had tears running down her cheeks; but she looked _content_.  
"Edward" she sighed and then her face crumpled in pain. She started to sob and I took her in my arms. It didn't escape my attention that I still held her hands and she still had her other one in my hair. As she sobbed; I did too. For my angels pain was my pain. And my angels tears made everything feel wrong. She shouldn't cry, especially after everything she has been through in the short time I've known her.  
"I wasn't ashamed Edward. I swear. I just didn't know how to tell them" she whimpered as I rocked her back and forth. I shook my head as she looked up at me.  
"Forgive me Bella. I love you and this baby so much. You are my everything Bella. Without you; I lived my life like I was dead. I moped around and Carlisle was getting fed up with me. I wished for every second that I could hold you or kiss you; but I couldn't. I made a mistake; the biggest of my life; by leaving you. I was just scared that you didn't want me; but I know isn't any excuse for what I've done. But please Bella; I want to kiss you again" I whispered the last part and I knew she understood because her eyes held yearning.  
"Kiss me Cullen" she demanded and I complied eagerly. It was a hot, fevered kiss. The kind that a man and wife exchange when the man has been gone for a while. Her sobs racked through my mouth as I was sure mine did hers. She held onto my for all dear life as she kissed me and I felt our tears collide at the mouth. They were tears of relief.

Eventually, Bella fell asleep. After much dispute about whether or not she had enough room with me laying on the bed with her. Eventually, she won. So here I lye on a hospital bed with my Bella laying across my chest. She had her head buried in the crook of my neck and every now and then she would unconsciously kiss it; making me shiver.  
Later; Alice came in and when she saw us; he face lit up. She still glared at me and a little while afterwards I found out that Bella had told them all about the baby. So in their eyes, I must have been the man who left his pregnant wife. _Wife?_ That gave me an idea. I slid out from underneath Bella and asked Emmett and Rosalie to look after her while I was gone. Emmett gave me a look that said 'I _dare_ you to run off on her again Edward.. If you do, I'll kill you myself'. I nodded and smiled as I left the hospital. I drove to Port Angeles; the closest shopping district from the abysmal Forks, Washington. I bolted into the nearest place I could find and scanned through the selection. "Hi, how can I help you?" I heard at the exact moment that I found the perfect one.  
"I would like to buy that ring please" I said, pointing to it.

BPOV  
I woke up to the sound of quiet chatter.  
"He's been gone for almost an hour Emmett" I heard Rosalie hiss and then I felt the panic rising in my throat.. Were they talking about Edward? Had he left me again? Those thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Edward's voice. He was apologising for taking so long. He sounded…_elated?_  
"Bella, I know you are awake. Can you please open your eyes?" he asked and then I heard a low, excited gasp come from Alice. I slowly unstuck my eyes from each other and the sight before me left me stunned. Edward was kneeling beside my bed with a velvet box in his hand.  
"Will you, Isabella Marie Swan; Marry Me; the desperate fool who is madly in love with you?" he asked and a smile slowly spread itself across my face.  
"Yes" I whispered, barely audible. But I know he heard me because his eyes went from smouldering, to dazzlingly blissful. He pulled the elegant ring from its box and slid it onto my finger. It was the perfect fit. Much like Edward and I.

We told Carlisle and Esme after our friends had their congratulations time. Alice was practically bouncing with joy and I giggled slightly at how happy she was when just yesterday she was murderously angry with my _fiancé. _ Finally, I was happy again. After weeks of living Edwardless I was finally smiling and _alive_. He sat beside my and played absently with a strand of my hair. Every now and then he would bend down and kiss me. _Just enjoy it Bella. He missed you too_.  
"Well this is wonderful" Esme cheered and Edward smiled down at me.  
"I am so happy for the both of you.. Now Bella, you should be free to go home tomorrow morning. Did you want me to set Edward up with a cot?" Carlisle asked me and I shook my head.  
"No thank you. He can sleep on here with me" I sighed and grabbed his hand. I kissed each knuckle before pressing a sweet kiss into his palm. Then he caressed my cheek and kissed me softly and sweetly on the mouth.  
"I love you Bella" he whispered into my mouth and I smiled against his.  
"I love you too" I whispered. It still hurt to swallow and touch my neck. I felt ashamed for trying to take my own life, but I didn't want to think about that. Because my reason for living had come back to me.  
I started to hum a familiar tune and I heard Edward gasp quietly. Then he composed himself and started to sing along.  
"You know, you know it's true" he whispered, "This is a fight I refuse to lose" he said the last bit and then his lips came crashing down on mine.

_1 Month Later_

"Bella, come on we are gong to be late" I heard from behind the door. I was still admiring the small bump I'd acquired on m stomach. Suddenly, the door flew open and Edward stood there in all his glory. Then, when he saw what I was doing; he came to join me. He hugged me from behind and placed his hands over mine. Now we were both holding our baby.  
"I love you" he whispered and then kissed my hair. I closed my eyes in happiness. Finally though, we had to go. On the drive Edward kept his hand in mine. When we arrived we were told to go in straight away and chastised for being five minutes late. As I lied down on the bed they put the cool gel on my stomach. I shivered at the temperature but shrugged it off.  
"Ok now see on this little screen here? Oh… Oh my" the doctor said.

**SORRY! I hope you liked this chapter and yes; I wanted to live you with a cliffhanger! Sorry guys! HAHAHA! And I am so sorry I havent updated in a while! Been really busy with assignments and stuff. Ok guys, One to Three more Chapters :/ AND THEN I CAN START A NEW STORY! *cheers* Anywayyy… Love you guys!**


	13. Counting to six? All BPOV

**Hey! Sorry for the lack of updatiness. Well; here is the next chapter.**

If he was joking, I was going to murder him.  
Was he _serious_? He couldn't be. Was this some kind of joke? He better not be doing this to get me excited and then hurt me again.  
"Twins?" I asked; my voice disbelieving.  
"Yes, twins" the Doctor smiled easily. "See for yourself" he said and turned the screen to face us. My eyes welled up with tears as I saw the two clumps that were inside me. My _babies_.  
"Edward" I croaked and turned to see that his tears had spilled over. I took his face in my hands and kissed him fiercely.  
"I take it this is good news?' the Doctor asked, smiling. I pulled apart from Edward and stared at the doctor before a small smile graced my lips.  
"Oh you have _no_ idea" I whispered before kissing Edward again.

"Twins?" Rose asked in barely a whisper and I nodded. She squealed with excitement and attacked me into a hug. Alice did the same.  
"Well, Eddie. I didn't think you even had one in you. But two at the _same time_. Wow, you must have eager swimmers bro" Emmett bellowed and I burst into a roar of laughter.  
"Emmett.. That was so… funny" I chuckled.  
"What? Me making fun of your man's tadpoles? You're not very nice Bella" he said and he looked so innocent that I laughed again. Edward then walked over and smacked Emmett in the back of the head; causing me to erupt into guffaws. When I stopped laughing, I saw everyone staring at me.  
"What?" I asked, instinctively covering my nose.  
"Bella, we haven't seen you this happy in so long" Alice whispered in a small voice and I smiled sadly at them.  
"I wasn't happy. Well, I was just really sad. Things couldn't be helped I suppose" I shrugged and walked t the bathroom. I stared at myself in the mirror and I was glowing. You never really get what people mean when they say that pregnant women glow; but now that I was pregnant, I noticed a happy aura around me; it was insane.

I lay awake in bed that night. Staring at the ceiling with a smile etched on my face. I couldn't sleep so I got up and decided to write a poem for my little ones.

I bit the end of the pen before I began.

_I don__'__t know you babies,  
but I love you all the same,  
and I just can__'__t wait till the day,  
when I call you by your names._

Everyday will drag and drag,  
until finally you_'__re here,  
and I will have the pleasure,  
of seeing you grow from year to year._

Your daddy is an amazing man,  
he helped me when I was sad,  
he held me close and loved me,  
and I am grateful and glad.

We saw the doctor today,  
he said we were having twins,  
at first I thought he was joking,  
but now I_'__m sure of you; I__'__m in._

I don_'__t know if I can wait,  
for the day when you arrive,  
but I am beyond euphoric,  
that at this stage your alive._

I_'__m going to tell you a story,  
one you__'__ll understand one day,  
mama hasn__'__t had a happy live,  
and that isn__'__t easy to say._

You see my little babies,  
my family are all gone,  
and until I met your daddy,  
I was practically alone.

My mummy and daddy passed away,  
and my brother and aunt followed soon,  
but babies I still see their faces,  
when I look up at the moon.

You daddy loves you very much,  
so do your uncles and your aunts,  
but be careful of them babies,  
because at being mature; sometimes they can_'__t._

I cannot wait to meet you babies,  
you_'__ll soon become my life,  
I just hope you come after,  
your daddy makes me his wife._

This world is a scary place babies,  
but I_'__ll care for you as best I can,  
but at being ready to be your mama,  
I__'__m pretty sure I am._

So I wrote this little babies,  
every word is true,  
and when you make your way in the world,  
just remember that I love you.

From Mama. **(SQUEAL! I wrote the poem. =] I am very proud of it actually)**__

I smiled and put the poem in the drawer.  
"Bella?" I heard my angel whisper groggily and I walked over to the bed.  
"Yes Edward?" I asked; wondering what could have woken him.  
"You know I love you right?" he asked.

_5 months later_

"My god you're fat" he said, staring at the bulge of my stomach.  
"Thanks so much Emmett" I said sarcastically and he smiled.  
"You're welcome" he said. He actually thought I meant it?  
"So, when are you going to… you know… pop?" he asked and I burst out laughing.  
"Next month Emmett" I laughed and his face lit up.  
"I'm going to be an uncle in a month?" he asked happily.  
"And again in five" jasper kindly reminded him. We found out recently that Alice is pregnant. She's four months along.  
"So how many is that put together?" he asked and then began counting on his fingers. Rosalie covered her face and shook her head.  
"I'm going to be an uncle of three in seven months!" he squealed and Edward erupted into a roar of laughter.  
"Six you idiot" he chuckled.  
"Oh if only mum could see us now. Two of us are about to be fathers and one of us can't count to six" Jasper mumbled and we all started laughing. It was then replaced by a loom of thoughtfulness.  
"Which one of you can't count to six?" Emmett asked Jasper; truly interested. That brought the good mood back.

We just sat around talking for hours and finally; the day came to a close.

As Edward and I walked hand in hand up the stairs; we enjoyed each other's company. I went to get changed and then when I came back out; Edward was smiling blissfully unaware of how beautiful he was.  
"What?" I asked with a smile.  
"I found your poem" he said and my cheeks burned.  
"You did?" I whispered and he nodded happily. He patted the bed next to him where I took a seat. He wrapped his arms around me and read out the poem to my stomach. It was moments like these you expected to see on a really cheesy pregnancy movie; not in real life. But I suppose my life was more like a movie.

I lay awake again that night as I had months before, but this time I thought about Zach, and my parents. I thought of how supportive Aunt May was and then; I thought about Edward.

He really was my light in all the pain.

**DON****'****T FREAK! This wasn****'****t the end! This was however the second last chapter. Now review lovelies xoxo.**

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	14. Forever from here All BPOV

_Ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch, OUCH!_  
"Edward" I whimpered while clutching at the sides of my stomach. He didn't move and the pain dulled slightly until it finally; slipt into nothing. My rigid body relaxed and I settled in to fall back asleep when suddenly the pain erupted again. Only worse. I let out a loud cry and then I felt the bed shift beside me.  
"Oh god" he whispered and that was the moment I realised the bed was wet.  
"I think my water broke" I said in a pant whilst fighting the urge to scream again. With that, his eyes set to panic mode and he rushed out of the bed and to the closet where he pulled out my suitcase. We'd packed most of It; but I wasn't due for another week. Finally, the knife stopped hacking at my stomach and I let out a shaky breath.  
"We have to get you to the hospital" he whispered.  
"Oka-" I was cut off by my own screams. Suddenly the light flicked on and Alice was standing in the door way with a small bad full of clothes.  
"What are those Alice?" Edward asked hurriedly.  
"They're for the babies. They're yellow, so they are neutral" she said and then quickly ran to take my hand. It look slightly odd seeing a pregnant Alice running but that thought was only interrupted by another bout of sharp knives. One of them jabbed just under my stomach and I howled in agony. Were contractions meant to feel like knives? Ii didn't have time to think about it because this one was dragging out.  
"Edward, she's not going to last until the hospital" Jasper said in a hurried whisper and I noticed Edward staring wide eyes at me.  
"What?" I asked in a gasp.  
"Push a little more" he said and I nodded quickly. I pushed as hard as I could and I felt like my whole body was being ripped apart from the centre. Suddenly, Edward's face broke into a breathtaking smile. He rushed over and positioned himself between my legs.  
"I see a head" he whispered and my heart thudded erratically.  
"Come on Bella, push" Rosalie said sternly, taking my other hand. I did as they told me but it felt like my head was about to explode from the pressure.  
"I… can't" I whispered breathlessly.  
"Yes you can, come on Bells" I heard a voice that I'd longed to hear for a year. It was my fathers voice. I whimpered but nodded and suddenly, my mum and dad were there, and so was Zach.  
"You can do this Bewwa. You're gonna be a good mama" Zach said in all his wide-eyed-innocence. I burst into tears but continued pushing.  
"It hurts" I whimpered and suddenly I saw my mum stroking my hair; but it broke my heart that I couldn't feel it.  
"Bella, I'm so proud of you. You can do this honey. You have two little babies depending on you" she said soothingly and suddenly, I heard a cry. It was the sweetest cry in the world; because it meant I was a mummy. Then, the pain came back.  
"Jasper, take her" Edward said and my heart swelled. _I have a baby girl_.  
"Got her" Jasper nodded quickly and then Emmett came into the room, rubbing his eyes with the backs of his hands.  
"Wha… Whoa, is that a baby?" he asked, pointing at Jasper, wide eyed.  
"Not the time Emmett" Rosalie huffed and turned back to me.  
"You're doing great honey" she whispered and wiped the sheen of sweat of my forehead. Suddenly, the knives rippled through my entire body and I howled in agony again. And then, the pain was gone. And I went weak against the bed.  
"My son" Edward choked happily and I looked up weakly to see his glowing with fatherly love. Zach smiled and touched the babies' hands, my mum stroked my cheek and kissed each of the babies foreheads, and my dad kissed my forehead and placed a firm hand on Edward's shoulder. Edward glanced at his shoulder in surprise as if he felt something.  
"Take care of my little girl and my grandkids alright?" Dad said. And then, they were _gone. _Again.  
"Well, that was an experience" Alice murmured and I chuckled breathlessly.  
"You're telling me". That had been the hardest twelve hours of my life.

_Four Years Later  
_"Happy Birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday Zac and Carly, happy birthday to you" we sang and the twins blew out the candles on each of their cakes. Yes, _each_ of their cakes.  
"Daddy, I want to be four too" Katie pouted.  
"You will in five months princess" Jasper said soothingly to his daughter. It was incredible how much everyone had matured over the past four years Even Emmett. Emmett came through the door then with a big box.  
"What's in the box Emmett?" I asked, truly curious.  
"Pie!" he beamed happily. Well, I _thought_ he'd matured as well.  
"Daddy!" Could be heard and suddenly Emmett dropped the pie. Rose came running out after her daughter.  
"Sarah" she sighed just as Sarah jumped into Emmett's arms; causing Emmett to drop the pie.  
"Sarah…" Emmett whined. "You made me drop my pie" I said with a pout and Sarah giggled.  
"Has anyone else noticed how unfair it is on Zac?" Edward asked suddenly and Zac smiled a blue, icing smile.  
"Meaning?" I murmured incredulously.  
"He is the only boy out of the kids" Edward explained and I was about to nod when Rose smiled.  
"That could be different" she smiled.  
"You're not…?" I trailed of suggestively.  
"I am" she squealed and I squealed along with her. I jumped up and down with her and as we turned around we noticed Alice gaping at Rose.  
"What?" Rose asked, examining herself to see if anything was wrong.  
"While Sarah was _in_ the house?" Alice whispered, mouth agape. I burst out laughing at that.  
"Yeah, all the time" Emmett said proudly and we all stared at him and Rose walked over and smacked his head.  
"Ouch" he murmured, rubbing it. Meanwhile Sarah was in hysterics. Suddenly, she hit the other side of his head.  
"Owie" he mumbled and put Sarah down, then she ran to Rose.  
"Did I do good Mama?" She asked. Three year olds can be so adorable.  
"Yes honey, you did very good". I smiled as I looked on at our happy family.  
"Mama?" I was bought of out my stupor by a hand resting on my leg.  
"Yes honey?" I asked, moving the hair out of his eyes. The bronze mess was disobedient, just like his fathers'.  
"What was Grandpa like?" he asked. I'd never explained the whole thing to the twins yet.  
"He was the best Daddy in the world for me" I smiled. Zac smiled brightly.  
"What was my uncle like?" he asked and my heart thudded painfully.  
"He was the best brother. He was only six when he died, and I miss him lots. His name was Zach too you know" I smiled and my son beamed up at me.  
"Really?" he asked happily and I nodded while fighting back the tears that were begging to escape.  
"I love you Mummy" Zac said and he hugged my stomach. He was too short to reach anything else, even while I was sitting down.  
"I love you too honey" I said while rubbing his back. He pulled back and smiled before running to play soccer with Emmett.  
"Emmett, don't hurt him" I scolded and he nodded sheepishly.  
"I won't" he smiled. All the boys went to play and Edward promised to watch out for Zac. He then gave me a chaste kiss. As us girl sat back and watched our men play we sighed.  
"Life is perfect" Alice smiled and I chuckled.  
"It can be" I countered and she shrugged while nodding.  
"Mama?" Sarah said.  
"Yes my Angel?" Rose smiled.  
"Why is Daddy such a goof ball?" she asked innocently and despite her better judgement, Rosalie burst into a roar of laughter.  
"Mama?" I turned to Carly.  
"Yes sweety?" I asked.  
"What's wrong with Aunty Rosie?" she asked with wide eyes.  
"Your cousin is very funny" I smiled while chuckling slightly.  
"Oh Honey. Daddy was born that way" Rosalie said when she finished laughing. She had tear streaks down her face and she was clutching her stomach whilst gasping for air.  
"I hope the knew baby isn't a goofball like Daddy" Sarah mumbled and Rose giggled quietly.  
"Even more goof to love Honey" she said and sat back in her chair.

Suddenly, there was a cry of victory. We all turned to see Zac sitting on Emmett. I stood up and clapped.  
"Go baby!" I cried while laughing and clapping. Edward chuckled and jogged over to me.  
"Where's my applause? I helped him" Edward pouted and chuckled. I took his face in my hands and kissed him sweetly.  
"There it is" I smiled once we broke apart.  
"Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww" I turned and saw Zac and Carly staring at us. Both their faces were contorted into masks of horror.  
"What?" Edward chuckled.  
"You kissing is yucky" Carly mumbled and I bit my lip to try and hide my smile.  
"Okay, time for a nap" I announced and Zac groaned.  
"Can't we stay up for a little while Mama?" He groaned.  
"Sure" Edward said just as I was about to object. I turned to glare at him but his face held mischief, I caught on quickly. I mouthed 'oh' and he smiled devilishly.  
"We'll just be kissing anyway" Edward mumbled and kissed me.  
"Hey, a nap sounds good" Carly said quickly and she and Zac bolted into the house. I chuckled as the other kids followed.

It was hard to b upset now, because everything was blissfully perfect.

**THE END!!!! Hope it was a good ending.. Can you believe it was a happy one!?  
3 **


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